‘Stop being so pathetic!’ I yell, confident in the knowledge that there are several decks between us and anyone else. ‘Be a man about it for once in your life. Get up there before he wakes up, if he’s going to, or before someone goes to try and find him for some of his pills or help with their stupid injuries. You need to do this NOW. I can’t come, I can’t be seen. You know that. Your mess, you sort it out.’

Suddenly it comes to me what we can do. I click my fingers. ‘I know. You’re a cleaner now. Take one of the cleaning trollies. Those are massive. Load him into that.’

‘And then what? Where will I take him? Throw him overboard?’

Fucking hell, this is such a nightmare. ‘No. That’s a terrible idea. From what you say, it will be obvious he’s been killed if his body’s found as you’ve helpfully smashed his skull in,’ I say sarcastically. ‘If we do that, he might wash up somewhere. The last thing we want is more police sniffing around.’

It’s clearly going to be down to me to sort this out as usual – I can’t rely on Jesse to come up with any sort of sensible plan. Then I have an idea. It’s gruesome, but it’s the best I can think of at short notice. ‘Put him in the macerator,’ I say.

Jesse’s mouth falls open. ‘Seriously?’

‘Yes! He’s dead – or he will be by the time he goes in! What difference does it make? He’s not going to care by then, is he?’ Fuck’s sake. I’ve spent literally years planning this and Jesse goes and ruins it just like that with his flailing and panicking.

He bites his lip and looks at the floor.

‘I don’t think I can,’ he says, so quietly I can barely hear him.

I nod tersely. ‘Right. So you’d prefer to go to prison, would you? And leave me to die of starvation down here on my own or have to admit to faking my own death? Do you want me to rot in jail? All because you fucked up my careful plans? Thanks a lot, Jesse. I thought I could rely on you. Clearly I was wrong.’

As I suspected it would, a wave of panic crosses his face. ‘No. There’s no way you’re going to prison on my account, Lola. I’m sorry. I’m sorry I got us into this mess.’