‘Tell you what,’ I say, ‘I’d really like some salad to go with this. I’ve hardly eaten anything green lately. Any chance you could nip up and get me some? The crew’ll be eating about now, won’t they? Can you just put some on a plate with some other stuff maybe and say you’re going to eat it in your room?’

He rolls his eyes but then says: ‘Anything for you, my sweet,’ giving my bum a squeeze as he leaves the room.

Once the potatoes are boiled, I drain and mash them with some butter, cream, and pepper, divide them in two and then crumble a few of my best sleeping pills into his half. I put the potato on the plates with the chicken, pour two more very large glasses of wine, and wait for Rick to come back.

After we’ve eaten I yawn theatrically and tell Rick I’d like to get an early night.

He yawns too. ‘How about you let me stay the night? Just this once?’ he pleads. ‘I’m pretty tired too. No funny business, I promise. Please?’

Before we were on the lay-up, we were both in separate shared cabins and anyway, I always had to get back because otherwise Jesse would give me the third degree about where I’d been. I don’t have that excuse now, but I don’t want Rick staying the night, and not tonight of all nights. It simply can’t happen.

I shake my head. ‘We talked about this. I do want to be with you,’ I say as I trail my hand across his chest, ‘but it needs to be casual for the moment. I need my space. And I think you staying down here with me makes it more risky. You might be missed, and I mustn’t be found. That would ruin everything. If anyone twigs that I’m not dead, there’ll be no life insurance. Plus I’d probably be in prison for perverting the course of justice or something, and you possibly would too so …’

He nods. ‘Understood.’ He yawns, stretches and then squeezes my bum again. ‘I’ll see you in a couple of days. You’ve got loads of food now and, like you say, probably better I don’t come down too much. Though it’s hard to stay away,’ he leers, pulling me against him.

I push him away, pretending I’m being playful but actually, I want him out of here ASAP. He needs to get back to his room before the drugs take their full effect – I don’t want him passing out in a corridor somewhere. ‘Maybe I’ve got something particularly special in mind for next time,’ I tease, knowing full well that there won’t be a next time. As long as everything goes to plan.