Chapters (95)
- Front Cover
- Title Page
- Copyright
- Contents
- Video #1
- One
- Two
- Three
- Four
- Five
- Six
- Seven
- Eight
- Nine
- Ten
- Eleven
- Twelve
- Thirteen
- Fourteen
- Fifteen
- Sixteen
- Seventeen
- Eighteen
- Nineteen
- Twenty
- Twenty-One
- Twenty-Two
- Twenty-Three
- Twenty-Four
- Twenty-Five
- Twenty-Six
- Video #2
- Twenty-Seven
- Twenty-Eight
- Twenty-Nine
- Thirty
- Thirty-One
- Thirty-Two
- Thirty-Three
- Thirty-Four
- Thirty-Five
- Thirty-Six
- Thirty-Seven
- Thirty-Eight
- Thirty-Nine
- Forty
- Forty-One
- Forty-Two
- Forty-Three
- Forty-Four
- Forty-Five
- Forty-Six
- Forty-Seven
- Forty-Eight
- Forty-Nine
- Fifty
- Fifty-One
- Fifty-Two
- Fifty-Three
- Fifty-Four
- Fifty-Five
- Fifty-Six
- Fifty-Seven
- Fifty-Eight
- Fifty-Nine
- Sixty
- Sixty-One
- Sixty-Two
- Sixty-Three
- Sixty-Four
- Sixty-Five
- Video #3
- Sixty-Six
- Sixty-Seven
- Sixty-Eight
- Sixty-Nine
- Seventy
- Seventy-One
- Seventy-Two
- Seventy-Three
- Seventy-Four
- Seventy-Five
- Seventy-Six
- Seventy-Seven
- Seventy-Eight
- Seventy-Nine
- Eighty
- Eighty-One
- Eighty-Two
- Eighty-Three
- The Final Video
- Acknowledgments
- About the Author
- Back Cover
“Where’s Chad?” I ask. I take a bite of the PB&J I packed the night before, but it tastes unappealing. My appetite has been weak. I feel like I shouldn’t be enjoying anything if Chloe isn’t around. “He said he had something to tell me.”
“He’s with Hannah,” Hector says.
“When isn’t he?” Cameron says.
Hector shrugs. He refuses to say anything bad about anybody. Ever. That’s just Hector.
But then an awkward silence settles over the table. Everyone keeps talking and eating around us. Dishes clatter. People shout and laugh. The smell of fried food fills the air. But at our table, it gets quiet. It kind of pisses me off, because I want to think this is the one place things can feel normal.
All three of them eat slowly but don’t speak.
“What?” I ask.
Hector looks away. Cameron takes a bite of his ham sandwich.
Only Natasha turns to me. “Well, we were just wondering if you’re going to the candlelight vigil tonight.”
I stop chewing. It tasted crappy anyway.
Hector looks away. Cameron takes another bite. He’d keep eating if the cafeteria were being shot up. He’d dive for cover or jump out a window with the sandwich in his hand.
“I thought about it all morning, but it just doesn’t seem right. People are saying a lot of shit. Why would I want to subject myself to that?”
Hector nods like he agrees. But then again, he agrees with almost everything anyone says to him.
Cameron kind of shrugs. “Well, we have practice. State is coming up.”
Only Natasha maintains eye contact. She’s honest. She’s willing to say what’s on her mind. That’s something she has in common with Chloe, which is why I can’t believe Chloe ran away like some people are saying. How could Chloe have a problem so big it would make her want to run and I wouldn’t know about it?
“What?” I ask Natasha because she is the most likely to respond. Maybe that’s something girls do better than guys. They actually talk about important shit.
“Well,” she says, “we all saw your video, Hunter. It’s spreading around school.”
My shoulders drop. The video. Why did I do that again? What made me think that was a good idea? “And?” I ask.
“If you don’t go to the vigil, then people are only going to know what they see in the video. And on the news. And the video is kind of, well, it kind of makes you…”
“Look guilty?” I ask. “Is that what you’re saying? Look guilty?”
Hector and Cameron look up in unison, like they choreographed the move. That word. Guilty.
Guilty.
Natasha doesn’t flinch. “Yes, Hunter. It totally does.”