It was what I’d suggested, but his words gutted me. Stuck a knife in my abdomen and dragged it across. Because his agreement confirmed how much pain I’d caused him.

“I’m so sorry.” My words came out in a shaky exhale, as if someone had just punched me in the chest.

He still wasn’t looking at me when he said, “Me too.”

There were so many other things I wanted to say, but it hurt too much.

I’m so ashamed of how I treated you I want to throw up.

I don’t know how to say good-bye.

I don’t know how to be myself without you.

Instead I took my phone out and called an Uber. When I saw the car was only two minutes away, I felt both relief and panic.

He finally turned back toward me. “At least let me take you home.”

My nose burned. Tears formed and pooled, blurring my vision. “You’ve already done too much for me.”

I wanted to hug him, kiss him, pull him to me and never let go. So as soon as my Honda Civic was in sight, I chased it down and jumped in. Because otherwise I wouldn’t have been able to leave.

He didn’t stop me.

Drew

Fix this! a voice screamed in my head as Chloe and her warmth, her scent, her everything disappeared, leaving me alone in the parking lot.

But I was too beaten down. I could only take so many hits, and I had reached my limit.

I understood why we were in this mess. How impossible her situation was.

I also knew I deserved more.

So much frigging irony. She was the one who’d helped me see my worth, and because of that, we were now parting ways.

Well, all I did was tell her how I feel. She was the one who chose to walk away instead of fight. So I let her.

It hurt to breathe.

Would anyone I cared about ever choose me back?

Chloe CHAPTER 55 FAREWELL FRANKENBREAKFAST

December 31–January 1

I arrived home well before midnight, but I stayed awake long after, tossing and turning in bed.

I wanted to jump out of my own skin. Everything felt too fucking much and I needed to scream or punch my rage into the wall or tear the room apart.

I had hurt him. The one who had put me first. The only one.

I was so desperate I texted Gen, secretly hoping she’d want to chat, maybe offer me some clarity, but when I messaged her thanks for not posting the photo, sorry I had to run, my night really blew up, all I’d gotten back was np. All for the best, I guess.

That night, in my dreams, I ran and ran and ran from a monster, only to realize that the monster was me.