Chapters (87)

A: The Chinese zodiac and Eastern medicine are important to my mother. Not so much my father. Their house is feng-shuied, but they view that more as an interior-decorator kind of thing; they’re not religious about it. What they are religious about is religion, ha. See religion section for way too much info about our community.

My parents believe strongly in filial piety and in traditional roles like the eldest son taking care of the family. They’re big on upholding the family name and saving face.

They’re strict, so physical stuff shouldn’t go past like a hand graze or kiss on the head. My mom is especially big on “purity,” as she grossly says.

And we’re big on food. Everything revolves around food for us. Bring a big appetite! Oh, and warning: my mom’s cooking can sometimes be a little inventive. Okay, a lot inventive. It may not be the easiest to stomach. Her Chinese food is great, but hold your breath for the fusion food. You’ll know when you see it because it won’t look like anything else you’ve ever eaten.

Q: Anything else we should know?

A: If you can find a way to work in how economics is actually a prestigious, difficult major that my parents shouldn’t be complaining about, I’d be forever grateful. If you feel like you’re laying it on too thick, I promise you’re not; they are experts at not letting in nice comments about me or UChicago.

Sample of Rent for Your ’Rents Classification Chart

	Greeting to parents	Showing affection to client in “private” moments	Showing affection to client in most settings	Showing affection to client in sad moment
Type A	Start with handshake; move to hug if the situation allows	Caresses to face, arm, hand Kiss to the forehead or head in appropriate circumstances (see appendix for more)	Physical contact to hand, arm, face, small of back	Hug Holding them close Stroking their hair
Type B	Start with handshake, touch their elbow with other hand if situation allows	Hand grazes Holding hands Kiss to the hand or head when appropriate	Light physical contact to hand, arm, face, small of back in select moments	Hand squeeze Quick hug in appropriate circumstances (see appendix for more)
Type C	Handshake, address as Ǎyí and Shǔshú	Meaningful eye contact Shared smiles Hand grazes when appropriate	Limit to very infrequent light physical contact, eye contact, smiles, and polite gestures like pulling out chair, dishing food out, etc.	Lean in Place hand in close proximity Show them using eye contact that you’re supporting them

Acknowledgments

If you had told 2013 dentist me to pursue the writing path because I’d have three published books by 2020, I wouldn’t have believed you. The journey thus far has been filled with wonderful, supportive people without whom none of this would be possible.

First, thank you to my readers. I write for you.