PLAYLIST

Half A Man - Dean Lewis

Locked Away - R. Cit, Adam Levine

Mine - Bazzi

Be Alright - Dean Lewis

Someone You Loved - Lewis Capaldi

You & Me - James TW

Outnumbered - Dermot Kennedy

When You Love Someone - James TW

Need You Now - Dean Lewis

Say Love - James TW

Better Now (Acoustic) - Etham

Where Do We Go from Here - Caleb Hearn

This City - Sam Fischer

Robin Hood - Anson Seabra

Hard Boy - Frawley

Mind Is A Prison - Alec Benjamin

AUTHOR’S NOTE

This book is not for everyone and I said that to myself and everyone before even writing it. This involves many emotions and maybe there are a lot of you that can’t understand them (which is completely fine) and I wanted to let you know that before you started.

I’m begging you to check the Trigger Warnings I have on my website.

Check out authormaevehazel.wixsite.com for more details.

Dedication

For my grandmother, Maria.

I did it, Grandma. I’m living my childhood dream. Hope you’re proud of me and that you’re smiling from above. Miss you every day.

PART ONE

CHAPTER ONE

INDIGO

Hugging a tree hurts more than I expected. Hugs are about comfort and warmth, but this is the polar opposite.

My left cheek is glued to the trunk, scratched and raw from the bark, as my arms circle the width of the tree. The funny thing is, despite the discomfort, I wouldn’t have let go if it wasn’t for the sound of someone coughing awkwardly behind me.

I release the trunk and turn around, praying to God this conversation will be over before it starts.

“Blue?”

Almost like a natural reaction to hearing that voice, my eyelids close shut. Suddenly, the decision to come out doesn't feel like a good one anymore. The cold seeping through my layers of clothing was enough to make me think that, and a fifteen-year-old girl mocking me only confirms it. She might be the only human presence I tolerate, but I can’t imagine how any part of this situation can be anything other than weird for both of us.

With a sigh of resignation, I peel my eyes open, only to have a smiling face greet me. I groan internally, not one for exchanging pleasantries. She lets out a muffled laugh, trying to hide it with her hand.

“Am I interrupting something?” she teases, scratching her nose.

I grunt in response, brushing mulch off my arms and cursing under my breath. “Yup.” I chew on my bottom lip and my body slides down the trunk until I’m sitting on the ground. “It was pretty great until you came.”

Without an invitation, she makes herself comfortable beside me, a sympathetic smile on her face. The blonde-haired girl tugs at her earlobe, sizing me up.

“What’s up with you? You look like you’ve seen better days.”