We kiss, just like before but with a difference. This time we kiss as if no one is watching. There’s a real urgency to it, as if the hunger I’ve had growing inside me is reciprocated. I feel Freddie has to have me just as much as I have to have him and that only turns me on more. He can have any girl he wants, genuinely. There are women (and probably even a few men) on the island who would leave their significant other in a heartbeat for him (I’ve known people hurt their partners over much less) – what the hell is he doing with me?

Reading my mind, Freddie stops.

‘Sorry,’ I apologise. I don’t know why or what for.

Freddie scoops me up in his arms and kisses me again for a few seconds to show me that it’s okay.

‘Let me take you back to the villa,’ he says.

‘I’d like that,’ I reply.

Freddie carries me up the path, safe in his arms. I’d say I’m in no danger of falling but that couldn’t be further from the truth. I think I am falling. I’m falling for Freddie.

31

Day 11

I wake with a jolt and puff air from my cheeks. I’ve been dreaming again and they’re getting raunchier and raunchier.

I wipe my eyes with the backs of my hands before running my fingers through my hair. In some places it’s still damp, in others the rainwater has caused it to triple in size. As soon as I remember the rain I remember the kiss – both of them.

Freddie is lying next to me in bed, completely naked. I look under the covers at my own body. Also naked. I didn’t dream it; we did get together last night.

I bite my lip as I relive every incredible moment of it. I’ve never been with anyone so attentive, so strong, so powerful yet so sensual. Never mind the thunder and lightning, the fireworks drowned it all out.

After watching that stupid movie, I don’t know why, but all my Freddie fantasies involved recreating scenes – I suppose that was all I had to go on. But he didn’t shag me against a tree or spank me or make me wear a leash and bark like a dog. He brought me back to his bed and somehow it was still like something out of a movie. I never knew great sex existed. I thought it was a myth being peddled to try to ensure the continuation of the human race.

When I lie back down on my pillow, Freddie wakes up.

As his eyes adjust to the light, his brain remembers what we did last night. I am so relieved when his eyes light up.

‘Good morning,’ he says.

‘Good morning,’ I reply. ‘Sleep well?’

‘Eventually,’ he replies with a smile. ‘You?’

‘Best night’s sleep I’ve had in ages,’ I admit.

‘We should retrace our steps,’ he suggests. ‘Work out what it might’ve been, that made you sleep so well.’