You’ve spent the last hour talking to yourself. But the good news is we were already able to process your evaluation in the meantime. That is, our program evaluated it, to be more precise. Without considering your gender or your”—a quick glance—“outward appearance, it has reached the conclusion that it would be best for both parties…”

A whooshing sound fills the lab director’s head.

There are two moments of fundamental debasement in the life of a human being. The moment when one truly grasps one’s finite nature. With all the embarrassments that come with it. With all the: What am I doing here if it’s all going to end anyway and I’m going to be eaten by worms when I’m gone and everyone else is going to go on as if it is perfectly reasonable to do so without me? The second moment of debasement is when a person recognizes one’s mediocrity. Many people are not gifted with the intelligence to be able to really savor this moment, they’re just suddenly grumpy, and it never ends, and their hair thins, and they look for scapegoats. That is the instant when people go into offices with knives. The gig is up for the lab director. In a week he’ll be out of work.

But until then.

KAREN

Sucks

The lab director’s genitals. She has to push up his stomach so it’s not constantly in the way. The lab director grunts. In a second he’ll put his hand on Karen’s head. An extra rush of power.

The fatuous think it excites women to have a flesh sausage rammed into their uvula. Or perhaps they don’t even think that much. It’s enough to take out their penis. Seeking a feeling of transcendence. They completely lose their minds as soon as there’s an orifice in their vicinity. “It was good for you, right?”

Asks the lab director, tucking in his genitals.

“Yeah, it was super, let’s do it again tomorrow.” Karen extends her sperm-smeared hand, the lab director grasps it. Karen leaves. She notices that she’s strange. Has become strange. She’s beside herself. And doesn’t know how to find her way back to some kind of inner peace. Suspects that it isn’t the injustice of the world that’s so enraged her, but something about herself. About her humiliation. About her first love. Rage, because she had briefly believed herself to be a normal girl living a normal love story. Only for everything she had planned to suddenly be called into question as a result of a guy with too-tight pants and a gold chain. Karen suppresses the thoughts about the fact that, as with most people, it’s not going to be about saving the world but about saving herself.

Karen had

Ordered nutrient solution with fetal bovine serum to culture adenovirus. She’d also ordered via the lab 293T cells for reproduction of the little bastards. With a pipe fermenter, 37 degrees, and a little blast of CO2, Karen sets up a starter stock of the beasts which she will soon need to transfer into a new home. For today there’s nothing more to do. Karen looks out the window—there’s an incomprehensible light outside.