Alison doesn’t want to sleep, because if she even dozes off, she wakes up to the knowledge afresh. The shock of it drowns her under a huge wave, like the first time all over again, gasping for breath, not knowing if she’ll ever surface or feel solid ground. It takes her all day to learn to cope, to calm her breathing, even to make a cup of tea without spilling it and burning her hands.

While she washes Charlie’s bottles yet again, she tries not to listen to the television, or contemplate the statistics and theories about how increasingly unlikely it is that her baby will be found alive with each hour that passes. The now familiar sickness is stuck in her throat.

‘Adam said he was nipping out for a packet of fags hours ago,’ Alison tells Ray as soon as he comes in, ‘and he’s still not back.’

He follows her into the kitchen. Breakfast bowls and mugs are stacked in the sink, unwashed. ‘I doubt he’d have gone back up to Sheffield,’ he says, ‘it’s only been one night. I suppose he’s in shock over it all, to be fair. The police will have told him to stick around until they find Charlie.’

‘But why would he go off again?’ She takes two Foster’s out of the fridge and hands him one. ‘What if he does have Charlie hidden somewhere?’

‘Then they’ll find him.’ He pulls the ring off the can and has a swig. ‘What’s the latest?’

‘They don’t seem to have a clue who’s taken him, and they can’t trace any flipping cleaning lady,’ she ends with a sob.

‘Come on, sit down, you need to calm yourself.’ In the sitting room he pats the seat next to him.

‘I can’t eat, I can’t sleep.’ She tips the can up and drinks.

‘What about the TV appeal?’

‘Several leads and a bunch of crackpot callers. The police aren’t saying much.’ She takes in a long breath. ‘Why would he go off again when I need him here?’

Ray opens the patio door and lights a fag. ‘I didn’t want to tell you this but, well, he was mucking about with someone, before he went to Sheffield I mean.’

‘Really, who?’

‘That tarty friend of yours, Jaz, is it?’

‘What? The little slut.’ She gulps her drink down until it is finished and takes the can out to the kitchen. She chucks it in the swing bin. She can hear Adam’s voice saying, Aren’t you going to recycle that? Fuck off. Ray is shutting the patio door when she comes back in.

‘Ever since baby Charlie went missing, I’ve had some of the lads out looking for Adam. Jaz reckons he only stayed with her for one night and swears it was before he got back with you.’