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Chapters (81)
  1. Cover
  2. Dedication
  3. Prologue
  4. Chapter One
  5. Chapter Two
  6. Chapter Three
  7. Chapter Four
  8. Chapter Five
  9. Chapter Six
  10. Chapter Seven
  11. Chapter Eight
  12. Chapter Nine
  13. Chapter Ten
  14. Chapter Eleven
  15. Chapter Twelve
  16. Chapter Thirteen
  17. Chapter Fourteen
  18. Chapter Fifteen
  19. Chapter Sixteen
  20. Chapter Seventeen
  21. Chapter Eighteen
  22. Chapter Nineteen
  23. Chapter Twenty
  24. Chapter Twenty-One
  25. Chapter Twenty-Two
  26. Chapter Twenty-Three
  27. Chapter Twenty-Four
  28. Chapter Twenty-Five
  29. Chapter Twenty-Six
  30. Chapter Twenty-Seven
  31. Chapter Twenty-Eight
  32. Chapter Twenty-Nine
  33. Chapter Thirty
  34. Chapter Thirty-One
  35. Chapter Thirty-Two
  36. Chapter Thirty-Three
  37. Chapter Thirty-Four
  38. Chapter Thirty-Five
  39. Chapter Thirty-Six
  40. Chapter Thirty-Seven
  41. Chapter Thirty-Eight
  42. Chapter Thirty-Nine
  43. Chapter Forty
  44. Chapter Forty-One
  45. Chapter Forty-Two
  46. Chapter Forty-Three
  47. Chapter Forty-Four
  48. Chapter Forty-Five
  49. Chapter Forty-Six
  50. Chapter Forty-Seven
  51. Chapter Forty-Eight
  52. Chapter Forty-Nine
  53. Chapter Fifty
  54. Chapter Fifty-One
  55. Chapter Fifty-Two
  56. Chapter Fifty-Three
  57. Chapter Fifty-Four
  58. Chapter Fifty-Five
  59. Chapter Fifty-Six
  60. Chapter Fifty-Seven
  61. Chapter Fifty-Eight
  62. Chapter Fifty-Nine
  63. Chapter Sixty
  64. Chapter Sixty-One
  65. Chapter Sixty-Two
  66. Chapter Sixty-Three
  67. Chapter Sixty-Four
  68. Chapter Sixty-Five
  69. Chapter Sixty-Six
  70. Chapter Sixty-Seven
  71. Chapter Sixty-Eight
  72. Chapter Sixty-Nine
  73. Chapter Seventy
  74. Chapter Seventy-One
  75. Chapter Seventy-Two
  76. Chapter Seventy-Three
  77. Chapter Seventy-Four
  78. A Letter From Ruby
  79. Acknowledgements
  80. About the Author
  81. Also by Ruby Speechley

There is a rainbow above their house and the daylight has muted to a pink hue as though she is entering a dream. The side gate to the back garden is wide open. She remembers bolting it. For God’s sake, has Adam been again? How is it he seems to know when she’s going to be out? She gets out of the car, wades through the long grass and hesitates. A fist of cold presses her chest. It is too quiet. There is no sound of Poppy scrabbling at the back door. She takes a deep breath and strides into the garden, but her foot catches on something and she falls. One hand scuffs along the gravel, the other springs to her bump. A line of scarlet beads bursts out of the ripped skin, edged with tiny stones and mud. Her left hip throbs. She presses the blood on her palm and caresses her hardening bump. Tears sting her eyes. She wills her baby to move. As she shifts to stand up, a silver thread running along the bottom of the gateway from post to post catches her eye. She reaches out, expecting to touch a cobweb, although it’s thicker than that and couldn’t possibly have stayed intact. Her fingers wrap around a solid thread of steel. She sits back on her heels. The wire has been bolted to the posts two or three inches from the ground. A shiver runs the length of her body. Why would he do this? Does he want her to lose the baby? A pain draws around her middle like a lasso, almost unbalancing her. After it’s passed, she carefully pushes herself up. Does this mean the baby’s okay? She’s had a few Braxton Hicks contractions today, but this is the strongest by far.

The pink light has faded to beige and erased the rainbow. She did not leave the back door wide open. ‘Poppy, Poppy!’ she calls, but there is no rumble of the dog scampering to greet her. She takes in a sharp breath and calls again. The kitchen is empty. There is water in the dog bowl; it’s been washed and brought in. What is going on here? She rushes out to the car and wakes Jamie. His lashes flicker, eyes open.

‘Come on, Jamie, please – I can’t find Poppy.’

He manoeuvres himself out of the car. ‘What do you mean?’ he groans, eyes red like he’s about to cry.

‘I don’t know where he is. You didn’t leave the gate open, did you?’

He shakes his head.

‘But wasn’t it you who put the bins out?’ She hates her accusing tone, but why has Adam done this? Why is he torturing her? She wants to scream at him and chuck all his stuff out of the bedroom window. Kick him out. Who does he think he is treating her like this?