Some things arent good to think on though so I yank up Midge by her green sweaties and give her a shove so we can get our show on the road. Right off I regret it cuz what if you can catch pinkeye off clothes? If Midget wakes up tomorrow with a crusty eye Im gonna suicide myself. So I let her run up ahead. Robbies lawn is soggy like the Dead Marshes Frodo almost drowned in but I got my snowboots on so I smash through it like one a them dozers that are everywhere.

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Dag squeals cuz shes a girl. Now her tights have spots a mud. Sorry, Dag! Dags the whole reason Im even wearing snowboots in October. Dag taught me how snowboots are helpful when youre stealing a theft. If a uniform rolls up, hes not gonna think to check snowboots for stolen goods. Plus my boots have blue and silver stripes that are very fresh. Plus theyre comfortable. Plus I aint got any other shoes currently. People at school tease my snowboots but they can eat a dick.

* * *

Few blocks past the burnt down super fun to play in Taco Bell ruins we see Deformo pacing around under a underpass. Hes this super ugly ass malformed ass homeless dude that spooks me real dire cuz a his nasty ass deformed ass face. He used to hang out closer to Pinebluff Glenn Estates, begging for food and sleeping all over the dang place, but the dozers keep chasing him closer to Yellow Street.

* * *

I have nightmares about Deformo, for real. I dont know if his mom ate bowls a toxic waste when she was pregnant or what but hes a straight up horror movie monster. I aint ever seen him except from a distance and, yo, thats how my precautionary ass wants to keep it. Knowing Dag she might try to get all deep in discussion with that horror movie monster but thats not good for Midget. Deformo would give Midge bad dreams till she peed the bed. You got to be safety first when it comes to little bitches.

* * *

We hit the sidewalk and I put my fists in my jean jacket and glare down the block at Deformo so it looks like Im packing. Isnt a total lie either. I may not have a gat but I do have six ninja throwing stars from KBK Pawn on 33rd. Two a them are four point carbon steel. That sharkweek is no joke. But I also got a eight point shuriken, a six point kohga, a four point black ronin, and baddest of all a stainless steel ninja disc designed like a dragon with scythe blades. I had to theft forever to afford that one. But its a smart value cuz it came with a nylon pouch free a charge and good thing too cuz that sharkweek is sharp! If Deformo ever gets his gross ass too close hes gonna get ninjaed!

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