Another of my enigmatic smiles. ‘Is that a yes or a no?’ he beseeched.

‘It’s a no.’

And here came Ted, hungry for details. ‘How are you, Rachel?’

‘Fine, Ted. Everything is fine.’

It wasn’t entirely true but in time it would be.

‘Your ex has left the country?’

‘Probably.’ I made myself smile again. ‘Either way, it’s grand.’

My gut was telling me Luke was gone and, now that it was too late, I still felt the panicky regret that I hadn’t gone to Justin’s lunch. A freefalling sense of loss whispered that I’d missed an opportunity to…what exactly?

Magic away the last six years?

Because that could never happen. The truth was that some things just couldn’t be fixed. My challenge was to live with that—and I could. The yearning that had been stirred up inside me would slowly eddy back down to the bottom, to where it had been living, and in time life would return to business as usual.

I was the first to arrive at the Abbot’s Quarter. A couple of minutes later, Dennis and Ella piled in.

‘There she is again!’ Dennis was in great form. ‘You missed a top-notch bricfásta!’

Frowning, I focused—Mother of God, the utter state of him! Just how many more days did he need before he noticed that his clothes were absolutely filthy? Obviously, at home, his wife did everything for him.

Not that Ella seemed to mind Dennis’s manky threads. With her good arm she gave him a playful shove, both trying to claim the second-best chair. Ella and her ilk survived by being lovely to everyone, even those who hadn’t changed their underpants in six days. She could have been literally choking from the stench from Dennis and she’d never admit it.

‘Wow.’ Ella had noticed my new sneakers. ‘Your kicks slap!’

They did slap! Mostly white but with leopard-print stars and a trim at the front. I opened my mouth to enthuse with Ella—and caught myself just in time. Jesus, I was off my game.

With a small, silent incline of my head, I smiled with just one side of my mouth. Over the years, the feedback had been that this odd smile was quite terrifying. When you consider the hours of practice I put into it, it was gratifying to hear.

Poor Ella, though. Compliments and praise were how she bonded. When people wouldn’t play that game, it left her with nowhere to go.

Here came Giles, lanky and debonair. He was displeased when he saw Ella with Dennis. Dear God, you can take the coke out of the womanizer…

*

‘…and next thing,’ Dennis read out, ‘Your man sits up in the coffin and says, “Whose lipstick am I wearing?”!’