BooksBarbecue
Back The Underminer Save as PDF
Chapters (21)
  1. Cover Page
  2. Title Page
  3. Copyright
  4. Table of Contents
  5. Bright Young Things campus of Clarkwell College, graduation in the town of Clarksville, somewhere upstate, 1990
  6. Cool Days open mike night at Kafka-fe, after band "2 Much" plays, 1991
  7. New on the Scene utside in front of Club Hush, for a film screening party of Kill Fee, 1993 o
  8. Single in the City at a French bistro, 1995
  9. Hangover brunch, the morning after, 1995
  10. Natural Health a chance meeting at Jasper’s Yoga Studio, 1996
  11. The Fat Flush ’90s in the foyer of a friend’s renovated brownstone, 1997
  12. Art Stars at Bonwyck Gallery, 1998
  13. Inner Odyssey the Burning Man festival in Nevada’s Black Rock Desert, 1999
  14. Life After Death facedown in the dirt of the desert, next morning, 1999
  15. Loyal Companions catching up at the dog run, 2000 catching up at the dog run, 2000
  16. In the Real World a run-in at the ShopShape magazine launch party sponsored by Senor Strawberry Liqueur, early 2001
  17. Wartime spotted at Kinko's, late 2001
  18. Office Job in the cafeteria of the Conde Nast building, 2003
  19. Settling a yard sale on an obscure block in the outer borough, 2003
  20. Starting Over in a remote village tavern on the farmlands of New Zealand, 2004
  21. Epilogue a gathering of friends

OK, breathe breathe. Feel the love I have for you. Drink some more water. Why don't you try repeating these words with me, OK? "Air my breath, Fire my spirit, Earth my body, Water my blood." And drink this water, lalala. N o it's not blood you're drinking. It's water. It just looks like blood because it's just become dark out, dark as night. An enveloping darkness like a big black blanket. But it's definitely water. And you better drink it, blood or no blood, because it may be the last you'll have for a while. Wow you are really seeing things aren't you?

OK, calm down, breathe, breathe. You don't have goggles, so you better wrap this shirt tightly around your eyes. In the high wind of this storm, fine grains of sand will blow into them and pierce your corneas in a matter of seconds. So whatever you do, keep your eyes closed until I tell you to take off the blindfold . . . I mean, eye-shield. I know that with your hallucinatory state the last thing you want to do is keep your eyes closed because basically you now have to confront the visions that lurk in your subconscious, but unfortunately we don't have a choice here . . .

Phew! Do you hear that whistling? That sound, coming closer, coming closer. The land and air are merging into one. A screeching sky of demonic hawks. Does that seem what it looks like to you in your mind's eye?

No it's just that I remember seeing that from my own near-schizophrenic freak-out on mushrooms six years ago. Does it seem like things are vibrating? Yeah. Things are going to start warping for you but I'm here, so let that be a comfort to you: I am here, and the world is real and I am your link to it, OK? So just remember we live in a consensual world. Remember we live in a consensual world.

Can you hear me? You probably can't. I probably sound far away. On the other end of a very long long tunnel. Like a voice pulling away, and peeling away everything solid and grounding with it. Until you are floating on a fabric made of detached whispers. A voice that slips inside your head, a secret you can barely keep. A haunt. A hate. Or maybe just the air.

Everyone hates you! No I didn't say that. I said hatred. I said haze. I said crazy you. I said I am so worried about you. No no no I don't mean to worry you. I'm just worried about you. Do you hear me? Do you, do you? Do you do? Hell? Hell? Hello?