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Back The Underminer Save as PDF
Chapters (21)
  1. Cover Page
  2. Title Page
  3. Copyright
  4. Table of Contents
  5. Bright Young Things campus of Clarkwell College, graduation in the town of Clarksville, somewhere upstate, 1990
  6. Cool Days open mike night at Kafka-fe, after band "2 Much" plays, 1991
  7. New on the Scene utside in front of Club Hush, for a film screening party of Kill Fee, 1993 o
  8. Single in the City at a French bistro, 1995
  9. Hangover brunch, the morning after, 1995
  10. Natural Health a chance meeting at Jasper’s Yoga Studio, 1996
  11. The Fat Flush ’90s in the foyer of a friend’s renovated brownstone, 1997
  12. Art Stars at Bonwyck Gallery, 1998
  13. Inner Odyssey the Burning Man festival in Nevada’s Black Rock Desert, 1999
  14. Life After Death facedown in the dirt of the desert, next morning, 1999
  15. Loyal Companions catching up at the dog run, 2000 catching up at the dog run, 2000
  16. In the Real World a run-in at the ShopShape magazine launch party sponsored by Senor Strawberry Liqueur, early 2001
  17. Wartime spotted at Kinko's, late 2001
  18. Office Job in the cafeteria of the Conde Nast building, 2003
  19. Settling a yard sale on an obscure block in the outer borough, 2003
  20. Starting Over in a remote village tavern on the farmlands of New Zealand, 2004
  21. Epilogue a gathering of friends

Ugh . . . but actually more seriously I should tell you that I got stuck having to defend you to a group of people all night. It was kind of uncool. They were talking such trash about you and I was like your main defender . . . No one big. Just Sheila, Alfredo, Alfredo's friend Joanna, Tyler, and a bunch of people from Miramax. It was awful. I mean, all that party pleasantry aside—I'm actually a little miffed about the whole thing. That's such an unfair position to put me in. And I've had to do it so many times. I don't think you know how much people—not "hate"—but really are concerned about you.

Actually I can't deal with you getting randomly emotional now. I'm really upset about it.

I'm sorry. I don't want to be an asshole about all this. Why don't you just have some water and chill out and then maybe write your apology notes. Things will get better.

Also, to boot, um, I totally don't mind if you don't thank me for getting your back last night.

No! Absolutely not! I will not accept any money! No, nononono. It was like seventy-five dollars. Because the driver was so angry he had to go all the way out to your place and then back into the city to drop me off, so I had to kind of bribe him. But nononono I don't want any money. It was more of a pain than anything else. Just buy me a drink sometime.

You owe me.

Are you depressed? You seem depressed. Are you depressed? You're chewing weird. No don't worry, don't worry. I am sure Sam and Sheila and Miramax will totally forget all about last night. I personally in a way think it's cool. You single-handedly put some intrigue and life and gossip into this tired scene! I mean we're all so aloof and reserved and everyone is so accomplished and professional and sort of "set" now, and we are all craving for someone to come along and just shake things up . . . give us some scandal, you know? Ha ha! But no we were all psyched. Whatever, you know?

Oooh. I have to go. Nicholas is picking me up to go see some tap dance performance he's workshopping with his friend Savion. Yeah! I know, he's a genius.

Here. I know you are going to kill me but this is some information about Askalar that I got from Greta. She says that from her research this will tell you all you need to know about the relative safety of this drug. A bunch of people thought you'd be a really super candidate. Just look it over, OK? I swear that's all I ask . . . not for me, but do it for you . . .

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Natural Health a chance meeting at Jasper’s Yoga Studio, 1996

Natural Health

a chance meeting at Jasper's Yoga Studio, 1996

Excuse me, I had my mat here, and I—

Oh, wow!

Ha ha, hi!