That did it. Everyone froze. I could almost see my words suspended in the air. Finally, Daddy turned around.

“How did she get the number?” he asked, measured.

“She said her lawyer got it.”

Anna raised her eyebrows at my father.

“Oh, for Chris’sake.” He shook his head.

“And here is the thing, she wants me to come and visit.”

“What?” he said, alarmed. “No! No. No. No. Bad idea, Jackie. Very bad idea.”

Whether it was my rebellious nature, my talk with Nicole, or my curiosity which currently outweighed my fear, in that instant I made up my mind.

“I want to go.”

“Out of the question.” Daddy set his lips in a line.

“Fine, then I’ll get a tattoo,” I parried.

“You are not getting a tattoo.”

“She even said she’ll pay for the ticket.”

“How? With Green Stamps?” he snorted.

“What are Green Stamps?”

“Never mind.”

“I want to go for my birthday.”

“Oy, Jackie!”

“Dad! I’m going to be sixteen,” I said, putting on a reasonable voice. “Dad, Daddy, I can handle it.”

“Sid.” Anna pointed at her watch. My father nodded. “Jackie, we can discuss this later.”

“When later?”

“Tonight.”

“Dinner?” I asked hopefully.

“No, wait, I can’t. I have a meeting.” He scratched his chin.

“Daddy, please.” Suddenly, I was on my feet championing my cause. “I know you hate her, and you have every reason to feel that way and to want to protect me, but she is my mother. What if something happens to her and I never see her again?” I said, using Nicole’s argument. “Think of how you would feel if that happened and you were the one who had prevented me from at least having that chance.”

Daddy and Anna looked at one another.

“Sidney?” Anna said. “Perhaps take it under consideration?”

This surprised me. Anna seldom intervened between my father and me.

“All right,” my father grumbled on his way out the door, “I’ll consider it. But don’t hold your breath.”

LIHUE, HAWAII AIRPORT

AFTERNOON

JANUARY 29

1985

Naturally, she was late. I sat on my duffle bag scrutinizing every forty-year-old woman with blonde hair. The airport was tiny with only one baggage area, so there was no place else she could be. I was beginning to think she had forgotten about me (a plausible theory) when I spotted her. She was at least thirty pounds heavier, wearing red nylon swim trunks and a plaid bathing suit top two sizes too small. Her once-shiny hair was sun-fried, her skin mottled. She paused for a second to talk with a skycap in a Hawaiian shirt, then as she started in my direction, I suddenly wished I could jump on the next plane home.

Heart pounding, I rose to greet her, but she hurried right past me toward the baggage carousel.