“Shit. Okay, I’ll be right down.” I wiped my hands on a rag, pulled the scrunchy out of my hair, and shook out my ponytail. I hated surprises. Especially surprise visitors. I ran downstairs and came upon the last person in the world I expected to see.

“Oh my God.” The blood rushed to my head.

“Hi Jax, I would have called but—”

“Nicole. I can’t believe this.” She had lost a lot of weight. Hair chopped short; dull and stringy. She had on an oversized sweater with frayed edges. A pair of dark glasses hid her eyes.

My heart raced. “Well, for Chris’sake, come in!”

She followed me into the living room, her sandals leaving dirt prints on the white carpeting. I motioned her to the couch,

“Yow.” She glanced around. “Nice digs.”

“Thanks,” I said, waving off the room as if it were nothing special, as if my entire existence hadn’t revolved around its creation. Nicole was here, in my home. I didn’t want to scare her away with my success. I sat beside her and tried to keep my hands from shaking as I took a cigarette from the white lacquered box I kept on the coffee table.

“Want one?” I asked.

She shook her head and removed her sunglasses. Her eyes were red and puffy. I put down the unlit cigarette and took a deep breath. I could see she was fighting tears.

“Are you okay?”

She shook her head again and covered her face with her hands.

“Nicky?”

“Oh, Jackie!” She burst out crying.

“Let me just get you… Hang on.” I ran to the powder room.

When I returned, she was hunched, wiping her nose with her sleeve. I handed her the tissues.

“I’m getting evicted,” she cried. “I have no fucking money. I can’t find a decent job. My life is falling apart. I’m sorry, I should go. This is humiliating.” She started to rise but I put my hand on her shoulder.

“No, wait. How…” I wasn’t sure what to say but I didn’t want her to leave. “Just tell me what happened.”

“I fucked everything up. Especially us.” She turned her face into the pillows, her shoulders heaving. I had never seen Nicole vulnerable. Never. Even as a kid when she was upset or hurt, she would get tough or turn mean or take revenge. Whatever resentments I might have held gave way then, like in that fairy tale where the ice chip lodged inside the queen’s heart melts. I was awash in love for Nicole and longing for our friendship.

“Nic. Nicky, come here.” I pulled her into my arms. “I’ve missed you so much.” Now, I too was crying.

“I’ve missed you too,” she sobbed. “Oh God, I’ve gotten mascara on your pillow, I’ll pay to have them cleaned.”

“Stop it,” I commanded. “It doesn’t matter.”