Gloria had cried the entire time she was filling out the Death-Cast registration form, tempted to click out after answering each question in fear of Frankie finding out and hurling insults—maybe even more—for providing private information that has already been shared freely to other places, such as hospitals and even their cable provider. She could tell he was recycling conspiracies from third parties, and she’s long given up on trying to get her husband to see reason. All he does is lash out whenever they’re in disagreement. Which is why Gloria was crying while registering for Death-Cast. Yes, she’s devastated whenever she thinks about how she’ll spend her End Day with Pazito, knowing that even a master planner like herself can’t possibly squeeze in everything she hopes to do with her son before dying, but more than that, she was heartbroken because she knows that her husband is primed to be the one who kills her.

She discussed this with Rolando—her best friend in this life, and her lover in another—who very understandably hates Frankie and only plays nice to keep her safe.

“Why not just leave him?” Rolando had asked a million times over the years, most recently when she confided in him that she registered herself for Death-Cast. “It feels like you’re accepting he’s going to kill you.”

If Gloria put herself first, she likes to think she would’ve walked away years ago. Just packed all her things while Frankie was out and left, the only evidence that she was ever there being a signed note about what a monster he is. Who’s to say if she would’ve actually gone through with this. She’s known many strong women, her mother included, who have stayed in marriages like this for their own reasons. For Gloria’s mother, it was the financial security that was necessary while raising Gloria and her sisters. For Gloria, she stays because her son doesn’t see his father as a monster. How could she tear Pazito away from Frankie, especially at a young age?

Over the years, the time to leave has never felt right.

First, Gloria thought things would change when she was pregnant.

She was wrong.

Gloria thought things would change when her son was born.

She was wrong.

Gloria thought things would change when her son slept through the night.

She was wrong.

Gloria thought things would change when her son started speaking.

She was wrong.

Gloria thought things would change when her son began preschool.

She was wrong.

Gloria thought things would change when her son booked a movie.

She was wrong.

Gloria thinks things will change.

She hopes she’s not wrong.

But she’s planning to be, thanks to Death-Cast.