I smile at her, softly, the emotion contained within her words is better than a hug. ‘Maybe you’re right, but I was happy with things the way they were. This is something Aiden needed to do, Hannah, and I support him. We miss each other, of course we do, we’ve hardly ever been apart since the day we married. But I want him to fulfil all of his dreams, even though I can’t be with him to enjoy this one. Losing Rachel changed my life in so many ways, not least the way I look at everything. And here, at least, I still feel my contribution really counts for something. I live my life wanting her to be proud of me.’

‘She would be very proud, Fern, as we all are, but don’t make this totally about other people. Indulge that artistic streak of yours, and I’m sure Nico is an excellent teacher. It’s just a shame he’s so darned attractive, but a good thing I have the most level-headed sister in the whole world.’ The look she gives me as she arches an eyebrow, catches me off-guard and I feel the heat begin to rise in my cheeks.

Linking arms with her, I toss my head nonchalantly.

‘I hadn’t even noticed,’ I reply. ‘Come on, I’ll introduce you to Kellie and then I’m off to let Margot know she has three extra people for lunch, as well as dinner. She’ll cook something special,’ I add. ‘She loves a reason to show off.’

20

More Goodbyes

It feels like the last supper. Owen is going off on his first overseas training exercise in a few days’ time. Hannah is going back to move in with Liam. And I’m fast approaching the six-month point in my time at the retreat. Aiden could be heading off to Thailand next month and then goodness knows where after that.

‘I can see a lot of you in both your brother and your younger sister, Fern,’ Nico says, leaning in as we watch them all dancing away.

I nod at him and smile, loath to take my eyes off them as they will leave early tomorrow morning. It’s like watching a ticking clock and knowing that each second is one nearer to departure time.

The meal was wonderful, and Margot stayed on to join us, which was touching. She’s had a glass or two of wine tonight and Taylor will drive her home later.

‘How was your family Skype session earlier on? Good enough signal?’

I make a face. ‘It kept freezing and Aiden was obviously disappointed. We had to give up in the end.’

‘That’s a pity. You told him the good news about exhibiting your paintings, didn’t you?’ Nico enquires, looking like the proud teacher celebrating his pupil’s first triumph.