‘It’s rare in someone her age but family history or smoking could be a factor. There may not have been many symptoms. By the time she came to us, the aneurysm had already burst.’

He doesn’t move. ‘I didn’t even know she was back in Brighton. I’ve been writing to her, sending her photos of Leo at different addresses. Weston-Super-Mare. Hartlepool. She likes to be near the sea.’

‘I’m so sorry, Joel.’

‘The last time I saw her was just after she’d told me she was going to end her pregnancy.’ He stops. ‘I don’t know what to do about Leo.’

I wait for him to say more. The second hand on the clock does a full circle before he speaks.

‘Leo hasn’t had any contact with his mother since he was a tiny baby. This might be his last chance.’

I nod. ‘How old is he now?’

‘He just turned nine.’

Nine years since it ended between us. How can it feel like a decade and yesterday at the same time?

‘Do you want to tell me what you’re thinking, Joel?’

‘I . . . it changes second by second. But mostly I’m thinking, shouldn’t he have the chance to meet her? What if he grows up and thinks I kept him from her?’

I take a deep breath. I’ve seen children dragged from their beds in the middle of the night to say goodbye to parents or grandparents. Who knows if it helps them, or not, in the years that follow?

‘You know, Zoë may not even make it out of theatre. Is he OK with hospitals?’

Joel nods. ‘Yeah. He’s had check-ups because of the Neonatal Abstinence Syndrome. And he took it in his stride after I had my ICD replaced. But . . . he doesn’t know his mum. Will she be in a bad way? I mean, I know she will, but to look at, when she comes round?’

The patient I saw was smelly and dirty and lost. She’ll have been cleaned up a bit for surgery but still . . . ‘She’s been living on the streets, I think. She looked quite neglected.’

‘Kerry . . .’ He holds up his hand and I want to grasp it. ‘What would you do?’

It’s the question we’re not meant to answer. But am I a clinician now, or a friend? I stare at the blue-grey floor. ‘This isn’t a medical opinion, Joel. But I personally would wait until the morning, when we’ll know more. Bear in mind she didn’t even ask me to call you. Maybe if she comes round, you can ask her yourself what she wants?’

He nods. ‘That’s what Liv said too.’

Liv?

I hate the name even before I am sure who it belongs to.

‘Liv?’ I make my voice casual.