Back The Weight of Memory Save as PDF
Contents ( 81)
  1. Cover
  2. Praise for These Nameless Things
  3. Books by Shawn Smucker
  4. Title Page
  5. Copyright Page
  6. Dedication
  7. Epigraphs
  8. Contents
  9. Anytime to Three Months
  10. I’m Afraid Not
  11. The White-Haired Woman
  12. The Emptiness
  13. Looking for You
  14. Closer Than They Might Appear
  15. The First Drowning
  16. The Tea Party
  17. The Field
  18. My Own Flesh and Blood
  19. Crossing Over
  20. A Place in This World
  21. Leaving
  22. The Man in the Hotel
  23. Driving Away
  24. Gone Again
  25. No Trespassing
  26. Into Nysa
  27. No Cares in the World
  28. You Should Turn Around
  29. When Everything Started Happening
  30. An Unexpected Encounter
  31. Night Swimming
  32. Shirley
  33. The Woman at the Window
  34. What’s Real?
  35. The Question
  36. The End of Me
  37. She Went Under
  38. Desecrated
  39. The Carpet
  40. The Boat
  41. Sinking
  42. The Weight of Memory
  43. Photographs
  44. Was It You?
  45. A Wedding and a Ring
  46. Dreams and Open Windows
  47. New Developments
  48. The Door
  49. Going Under
  50. The Loss of You
  51. The Glassy Sea
  52. Following Her Down
  53. Something Beyond Us
  54. Let’s Not Leave Her Alone Anymore
  55. Too Many Secrets
  56. Heavy Things
  57. She’s Gone
  58. Our Future Spelled Out
  59. Screams at the Cabin
  60. So Close
  61. When You Arrive at the End, Keep Going
  62. It’s True
  63. The Other Side
  64. Reality
  65. Swimming Underwater
  66. Only the Deepest Pools Remain
  67. The Open Window
  68. When I Knew
  69. The Clouds Bear Down
  70. The Far Green Country
  71. Gone
  72. The Fly
  73. The Nesting Doll
  74. Two Months Later
  75. Floating Away
  76. Another mesmerizing story from Shawn Smucker
  77. Prologue
  78. Acknowledgments
  79. About the Author
  80. Back Ads
  81. Back Cover

First Baptist was the obvious front-runner in our town. On Sundays people had to park on the street because the parking lot was full, and we watched them glide confidently through the wide, welcoming front doors and into the presence of God Almighty. The men wore mostly navy-blue or gray suits with paisley ties while the women swished along in ankle-length dresses and heels. Sometimes we could hear them singing all the way from the diner.

Holy, holy, holy! Lord God Almighty!

Early in the morning our song shall rise to thee.

Holy, holy, holy! Merciful and mighty,

God in three persons, blessed Trinity!

Holy, holy, holy! All the saints adore thee,

Casting down their golden crowns around the glassy sea;

Cherubim and seraphim falling down before thee,

Which wert, and art, and evermore shalt be.

“What do you think they mean by that?” I asked Tom one Sunday morning while the four of us grabbed brunch at the Nysa Diner.

“What does who mean by what?” Tom asked, shoveling a forkful of omelet into his mouth.

“‘God in three persons, blessed Trinity,’” I said.

Tom shrugged. “Who knows what church people think.”

“The Trinity is made up of God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit,” Shirley recited unexpectedly.

We all gaped at her before bursting out laughing.

“What?” she said, blushing.

“How’d you know that?” Tom asked, admiration and confusion mixing in his voice.

Shirley shrugged. “My parents used to take me to church when I was little, that’s all.”

“Mine too,” I admitted. “But I don’t remember any of it.”

“What were they saying about a glassy sea?” I asked, hoping Shirley could enlighten me.

But she took another sip of her orange juice and shrugged. I stared out through the window and imagined the cold lake waters on that December morning. We sat there eating and not saying a word, and at first Mary’s voice was so quiet I didn’t know she was talking.

“It’s where you go after you die,” she whispered. “Over the sea, and it’s where everything wrong is made right.”

How quiet we were after Mary said that, none of us even eating or drinking. The only sound was the rest of the people in the diner chatting, their metal silverware clinking against the plates, the old men slurping their piping hot coffee, and the cook in the back calling out orders as they were ready.

Tom tried to say something funny to lighten the mood, but Mary’s words clung to us.

It’s where everything wrong is made right.

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A few weeks later, Tom pulled his car up along the sidewalk, and the four of us walked into Saint John’s Episcopal Church. We chose the Episcopal church because the Catholic church was too intimidating and the Baptist church seemed to require a level of dressing up we could not attain to. It was a cold Sunday night, only a few days before Christmas. I guess that’s why we were there. We wanted to celebrate our last Christmas as high school students, mark the season outside of our own disinterested homes strung with limp strands of weak lights.