Chapters (76)
- Title Page
- Copyright Notice
- Dedication
- Foreword: Who Is Simple?
- Feet Live Their Own Life
- Landladies
- Simple Prays A Prayer
- Conversation on the Corner
- Simple on Indian Blood
- A Toast to Harlem
- Simple and His Sins
- Temptation
- Wooing the Muse
- Vacation
- Letting off Steam
- Jealousy
- Banquet in Honor
- A Veteran Falls
- High Bed
- Final Fear
- There Ought to be a Law
- Income Tax
- No Alternative
- Springtime
- Last Whipping
- Seeing Double
- Simple on Military Integration
- Blue Evening
- A Letter from Baltimore
- Seven Rings
- What Can a Man Say?
- Empty Room
- Picture for Her Dresser
- Cocktail Sip
- Apple Strudel
- Bop
- Formals and Funerals
- Fancy Free
- Midsummer Madness
- Morals Is Her Middle Name
- They Come and They Go
- A Million—and One
- Two Loving Arms
- All in the Family
- Kick for Punt
- Subway to Jamaica
- No Tea for the Fever
- Boys, Birds, and Bees
- On the Warpath
- A Hearty Amen
- Must Have a Seal
- Shadow of the Blues
- Once in a Wife-time
- Present for Joyce
- Christmas Song
- Tied in a Bow
- Sometimes I Wonder
- Four Rings
- Simply Love
- Bang-up Big End
- Duty Is Not Snooty
- Bones, Bombs, Chicken Necks
- A Dog Named Trilby
- Enter Cousin Minnie
- Radioactive Red Caps
- Two Sides Not Enough
- Puerto Ricans
- Minnie Again
- Vicious Circle
- Again Cousin Minnie
- Name in Print
- Minnie One More Time
- An Auto-Obituary
- Jazz, Jive, and Jam
- About the Author
- Newsletter Sign-up
“Do you hear that?” he asked. “It’s not about me, neither about you. All these plays, dramas, skits, sketches, and soap operas all day long and practically nothing about Negroes. You would think no Negroes lived in America except Amos and Andy. White folks have all kinds of plays on the radio about themselves, also on TV. But what have we got about us? Just now and then a song to sing. Am I right?”
“Just about right,” I said.
“Come on, let’s go take a walk.” He put on his shoes first, his pants, then his shirt. “Is it cool enough for a coat?”
“You’d better wear one,” I said. “It’s not summer yet, and evening’s coming on. You probably won’t get back until midnight.”
“Joyce is gone to a club meeting, so I won’t be going to see her,” he said. “She’s expecting her sister-members to elect her a delegate to the regional which meets in Boston sometime soon. If they don’t, she’ll be a disappointed soul. She used to skip meetings, but that regional is why she goes regular now. Let’s me and you stroll up Seventh Avenue to 145th, then curve toward Sugar Hill where the barmaids are beautiful and barflies are belles. I have not been on Sugar Hill in a coon’s age.”
It was dusk-dark when we reached the pavement. Taxis and pleasure cars sped by. The Avenue was alive with promenaders. On the way up the street we passed a photographer’s shop with a big sign glowing in the window:
HARLEM DE-LUXE PHOTOGRAPHY STUDIO
IF YOU ARE NOT GOOD-LOOKING
WE WILL MAKE YOU SO
ENTER
“The last time I come by here,” said Simple, “before my lady friend started acting like an iceberg, Joyce told me, ‘Jess, why don’t you go in and get your picture posed? I always did want a nice photograph of you to set on my dresser.’
“I said, ‘Joyce, I don’t want to take no picture.’ But you know how womens is! So I went in.
“They got another big sign up on the wall inside that says:
RETOUCHING DONE
“‘I don’t want them to touch me, let alone retouch,’ I told Joyce.
“Joyce said, ‘Be sweet, please, I do not wish no evil-looking Negro on my dresser.’ So I submitted.
“Another sign states:
COLORED TO ORDER—EXPERT TINTING
“I asked, ‘Joyce, what color do you want me to be?’
“Joyce said, ‘A little lighter than natural. I will request the man how much he charges to make you chocolate.’
“About that time a long tall bushy-headed joker in a smock came dancing out of a booth and said, ‘Next.’
“That were me next. There was a kind of sick green light blazing inside the booth. That light not only hurt my eyes, but turned my stomach before I even set down.
“The man said, ‘Pay in advance.’