“That’s right,” said Simple. “Joyce is still acting like she just met me—like I was a total stranger with no divorce—which maybe is why I fell into Zarita’s arms today, which were wide open. You don’t need a decree to relax with Zarita. You know, I usually spends Sundays with Joyce. But she said she were going to Jersey to see her godchild this afternoon. I wonder if she went? I did not ring seven to find out. Sometimes if her landlady catches me when Joyce ain’t home, she just wants to talk and talk and talk, and I did not feel like talking to that woman today. So when I passed by the Heat Wave and saw that sign up—COCKTAIL SIP—I went in.”

“And what did you find but sin—in the form of Zarita. ‘When the cat’s away, the mouse will play.’”

“Did Lizzie Beasley say that, too?”

“That’s not Elizabethan, that’s doggerel,” I stated, “simple but true.”

“Do you think I’m simple? If I wasn’t drunk, I would feel bad. But I do not feel bad. I feel like if Joyce had rather go see some godchild than to see me, okay. Let the good times roll! They have rolled this evening! Look, am I wrong?”

“I am neither Judge Rivers nor Judge Delany, so I will not pass judgment on you,” I said.

“I had rather go up before them than to go up before a lady judge. If my case ever got in front of any lady judge, I bet she would make me pay for Isabel’s divorce. Lady judges is tight, tight, tight. But let us not mention judges this evening, partner. As long as I know what I am doing, I will never appear before one.”

“You had better stop mixing your drinks then. You’ve been drinking cocktails, now you are drinking beer—so after a while you will not be clear as to what you are doing. Have you had your dinner yet?”

“You know I don’t like restaurant cooking. And Joyce—let’s not talk about her—no invite there this Sunday. I believe I will go home to bed right now, up to my Third Floor Rear. I told Zarita I might wait till she comes back, but I changed my mind. Them Specials is wearing off. Tell her I have went. If she’s got any more kisses for me, tell her to leave ’em in a cup.”

Apple Strudel

Apple Strudel