I thought she’d be in a session, but she picked up on the second ring. She has to eat lunch too, I thought, gratitude and trepidation flooding me.

‘Hi, darling,’ she said, warm and kind. ‘How are you surviving the real world?’

That was it. I pushed my way out of the crowd and leant against a wall, the last twenty-four hours spilling out of me in a painful torrent. How determined Mum was to destroy our relationship, even though it was the most precious thing I had. How appalled my family, and my boss, were with me. How fragile and yet how alive I felt – thanks to her – and how hard it had made it to slide back into the grey, hollow routines of the ‘normal’ life I was supposed to want. I’d obviously forgotten about the dank cold of my shared bedroom by then. In my memory, it felt like the Ritz.

‘My love…’ said Amber. ‘Sometimes things have to burn to the ground before they can be rebuilt. It’s never easy.’

I looked up into the infinite blue, searching for the right words for what I needed to ask her. Normally I had a trick – a back route to get around any situation that I knew the other person wouldn’t have a map for – but there was no fooling Amber.

‘Amber, I don’t think I can come this week. I’ve got like, eighty-two pounds left of my overdraft limit.’

The pause felt infinite.

‘Mum means what she said,’ I added. I started crying, ducking my wet face against the loop of Sophie’s scarf and ignoring the nosy stares that I was getting from the stream of passers-by. ‘I need you, but she doesn’t care. She only cares about herself.’

Amber exhaled.

‘I’m so glad that you said that. I’m so proud that you’re at the point where you can acknowledge the truth of the relationship.’

My stomach dropped. Did she mean that her work was done?

‘Thanks…’ I said nervously.

‘Just come along tomorrow as planned,’ she said. My knees buckled, and I leant more heavily against the wall for support. ‘I’m not going to abandon you, Rachel,’ she continued. ‘Don’t worry. You’re safe now. You know that, don’t you, darling?’

My heart was pounding with relief. Safe now. She’d saved me.

‘Thank you. Thank you so much,’ I said. I thought of Mum’s smug face. She only cares about the money. She knew nothing about who Amber really was. What we meant to each other. I was gabbling now. ‘I’ll pay you back. I promise you, I’ll pay you back!’

‘I know you will,’ she said crisply. I liked the way the words sounded in her mouth. It was definitive, like she believed me, not like I was some overgrown child that she had to indulge.