Chapters (50)
He considers. “If you come with me, I want it to be because there’s nowhere else is the world you’d rather be. Not because you’re hiding.”
“The truth is,” she continues. “I’m still in transition. When Sunil died, part of me died with him. I feel like I’m just getting to know myself again. Some parts of me are the same. But some parts of me are totally different. It’s all so new. Does that make sense?”
“I get it,” he nods. “It was the same for me. Two years later and I’m still working out who I am without my twin to bounce off of. Every time someone dies, we lose a bit of our identity.”
“And I’m still figuring out who I am without Sunil. I’m still figuring out what I want.”
She pauses. “For a long time after Sunil died, I thought I should be dead too. He was dead, and it was my fault, so I should be dead too. I thought that’s what I deserved. But then I met you, and you helped me realize I have a life that’s all my own. And it’s a life worth living, even if it feels like I’m starting over sometimes. I finally believe it. That I deserve to live. And it’s okay. I’m not doing anything wrong.”
“Can’t living your new life include me?”
“It always will,” she tells him, earnestly, holding his gaze. His eyes are dark and soft and open. Those wells of empathy that made all the difference to her. “When every other person failed me, you were there, letting me know that I wasn’t alone. I’ll never forget that. I know I’ve never told you, Hawk, but you saved my life. And I’ll never be able to thank you enough.”
He smiles at her with gentleness. “No, Kavita,” he says. “You saved yourself. You’re doing it right now. Knowing you’re okay is all the thanks I’ll ever need.”
The fierceness of the wind pushes them together. She wraps her arms around him and buries her face in the cool bend of his neck. He holds her close, and squeezes, and squeezes. As the wind rages through her hair, he whispers into it, “You’re my best friend, too.”