My Mom’s Car

I see my mom’s car outside when

I’m walking back to

class from the bathroom

why is she here

is it about Clara on the

ground at school

am I in trouble what

did I do I’m sure

I’m in trouble

my face gets warm like

a light turned on in my

head by

someone else

I can’t find

the off switch

I take my

time because I’m

scared of my sixth-grade teacher Mr. Heart

he yells at our class a lot

his voice bellows and pricks me

like needles

I can hear it

in other

parts of the school too

but when I’m in his room it feels different

the difference between watching

the snow fall and being in

the snow

if you are in the snow you

are cold and wet

but watching the snow from

the inside is beautiful

you’re supposed to do it with

a mug of hot chocolate around

a crackling fire hugging your family

laughing and sharing stories

at least that’s

what the books say

no one calls me into

the office

no one tells me why

my mom is here

nothing

silence

Talk

I speak perfect English but

try not to speak at school

when someone speaks to me

I just answer and

look down

sometimes kids laugh and say

AH SO you no speak Engrish

people talking is like music

I listen

to the music from the

outside and it always sounds pretty

but I can’t play any instruments

maybe I can

learn by listening by seeing

other people’s lips go up and down

side to side

speak up more my dad says

talk more like the Americans

he tells us how

he’s learned to speak up at work

but I don’t know how

to be like him

everywhere I turn I am

different everything

we do is

different my mom tells me

don’t be like the Americans

they brag too much

talk too much

I don’t know who I’m

supposed to

believe

Neighbors

Our neighbors are

mostly American mostly Jewish

so I think Jewish and

American are the same

the Rubins live

diagonal to us

Josh is the younger boy

his mouth is slightly crooked

he has an endless

tan on his face

he has curly

brown longish hair

something

mean about the way he rolls up

his snowballs and looks

in my eyes before

he throws them

the snowballs little

white fists of

ice and

cold

The Birds

At school I’m especially

scared of

Josh Rubin and

Steve Zucker

they follow me

say chink and

hi ya as they slice the air

with their hands and squat

they call me fried rice

and egg roll

in PE we run

around the field every Friday

my heavy body feels

like a wheelbarrow

Steve follows me

runs by my side

turns around and runs

backwards

his arms swing hard

he’s facing me

laughing

his blond curls

bounce in

the air

his mouth covers

a lot of

his face so that