I roll my eyes

as if I didn’t already

know that

The New Wig

It’s almost the end of the

school year

finally

I imagine a whole summer

without Mr. Heart

a whole summer without Miss Beeoh

without Josh or Steve

or schoolwork or tests

maybe I can see Annie again

maybe Annie will want to be friends again

a whole summer of mowing the lawn up and down

overlapping just a little bit

a whole summer of

playing tennis at the bubble

and at the end of the summer

our big road trip

I don’t know if I can wait

that long

I look out the window and see

Clara in her navy

beret placing her new wet wig on

the chair on the deck

I look up at the sky

a new set of clouds is out again spiraling and

shaping themselves

trying to be

permanent

Clara looks at a leaf lifting on

the chair but not blowing away

I want so badly

to say something to her

the urge like a hundred fists

punching me from the inside of

my chest

I want to tell her

I know your secret

The Tournament

I’m excited the tennis

tournament is outside

the sun warms

my back

the wind blows

loose strands of hair

onto my eyelashes

I’m on the end court

I can see all the other girls

on the courts next to me

my new tennis friends wave

at me and wish me luck

I wave back and give

them a thumbs-up

I can see my parents

sitting on lawn chairs outside

of the fence

they wave

my dad smiles

I know my mom

doesn’t smile because she’s

nervous

Clara’s standing

against the fence

wearing her white

baseball hat

I can barely see her

the fence divides

her into

tiny

diamonds

Here

My opponent and I hit

ground strokes

we switch sides

we run up

and volley

she slams

an overhead down

for a winner

I serve two aces

we sweat

we grunt

pump our arms

pump our fists

dry off our sweaty rackets

my two feet land on the

ground

here

I’m nervous here but

feel whole

I can do things here

that I can’t do anywhere

else

my opponents don’t

make fun of me

my opponents look

scared of me

my opponents don’t

think I’m ugly

my opponents think

my strokes are

beautiful

my opponents and I start

at the same place

here we’re even

our scores start at

love love

and I feel like I can

lift the world with

my racket

The Win

My parents don’t hug me

after I win

but they stand across

from me

smiling

so I know they are proud

Coach Meredith comes

over and

gives me a high five

Great job!

she says loudly

your daughter is doing

fantastic

she tells my parents

she quickly trots to

the next court to

talk to one of my

teammates who lost her match

it no longer matters that

my parents don’t give