She is dressed in her usual elegant trouser suit and kitten heels combination. Today the suit is a deep emerald colour that brings out the green in her eyes. I look down at my thin polyester nightdress and feel ashamed. Then I think about Sean and wonder what kind of clothes Freya Nielssen wears. I imagine her as a glacial Nordic blonde, glamorous and elegant, everything I’m not. I imagine him lying in bed with her, nuzzling her.

‘I’m sorry I couldn’t get here any sooner,’ says Julia, interrupting my thoughts. ‘I had some paperwork to catch up on this morning.’

She sits down on the end of the bed and clasps her hands on her lap. It’s then that I see her appearance is not as immaculate as I first thought. Her hair is scraped back in a messy bun and there are dark circles under her eyes. I feel a stab of guilt. Her job must be busy enough without me causing her trouble.

‘It’s very good of you to come,’ I say. ‘I do appreciate it.’

She nods her head.

‘So, Maggie, do you want to tell me what happened?’ she says, cutting though unnecessary pleasantries. ‘When Sonia called me last night she said that you’d got caught in the rain and were in a pretty bad state.’

‘Yes,’ I say, wishing I could disappear into the folds of the bedclothes. ‘I went down to the river by Ketton House Farm.’

‘Why did you go there?’

‘It was … it was a place where something bad happened,’ I say, not meeting her eye. ‘Something that I have a strange feeling might be connected to the accident.’

‘I see,’ says Julia, frowning slightly. ‘And do you want to talk about this bad thing?’

‘No,’ I say firmly. ‘It’s, well, it’s rather personal. Besides, I’m fine now. The shivers have gone. Sonia made sure I had a hot bath last night.’

Julia narrows her eyes. She doesn’t believe me for a second.

‘Sonia also told me that you thought the pills were making you feel dizzy,’ she says, tucking a stray piece of hair behind her ear.

‘I was in a bad state when I said that but … well, it’s true, since I’ve been taking the pills I’ve been feeling strange.’

‘What do you mean by strange?’

‘I’ve just been feeling numb, like all my responses have slowed right down.’

‘That could be the neurological effects of the accident rather than the medication,’ says Julia, her face serious.

‘That’s what I thought at first,’ I say. ‘But this felt different to the memory loss and actually that side of things was starting to get better, I was beginning to remember things, but then I heard Elspeth singing and –’

‘Hold on,’ says Julia, looking utterly confused. ‘You heard Elspeth singing?’