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Chapters (67)
  1. Cover
  2. Dedication
  3. The Staring at the Wall Club
  4. The Pink Car
  5. Teatime in Germany
  6. Writing for Dummies
  7. I’ve Got Problems
  8. Up Our Tree
  9. No Way!
  10. I Hear Voices
  11. Ten Things
  12. Early Alarm
  13. The Grass Cutters
  14. Rebecca’s a Genius ☺
  15. Guilty ☹
  16. Jake’s a Genius
  17. SCUBAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!
  18. The Army in the Box
  19. Dad, Help!
  20. Our Square Is a Battlefield
  21. Weakness
  22. Me, the Knight and the Wardrobe
  23. X + Y = Spy!
  24. Pass the Sauce
  25. Astroboy2008
  26. We Spy
  27. What Have I Done?
  28. Tipping Point
  29. That Kid
  30. Loser!
  31. Desperation
  32. Gunfight
  33. No Chance
  34. Postmortem
  35. I Can Keep a Secret . . .
  36. The Mechanical Turk
  37. Beginner’s Luck?
  38. Panic!
  39. Revenge?
  40. Champion!
  41. Tug of War
  42. The City and the Wall
  43. I’m Sorry, Jake
  44. Why Did Dad Do That?
  45. Surprise!
  46. First Round
  47. Tick, Tick, Tick
  48. Blue Lights and Disinfectant
  49. Is It Okay to Pray Only When You Want Something?
  50. Stage Fright
  51. Hugs and Soppy Films
  52. Plan B
  53. Uh Oh!
  54. What Mr Keytes Said
  55. Teatime in Germany, Again . . .
  56. Worms in My Belly
  57. Final
  58. Down, But Not Out
  59. Knockout
  60. When We Are Famous
  61. Can’t Wait Till Morning
  62. Alerts!
  63. What Do I Do?
  64. Confrontation
  65. Final Curtain
  66. Zip Wire
  67. Acknowledgements

‘We’ve got to find our tables.’ Rebecca points at the tables with numbers written on the corners. ‘I am table six,’ she says. ‘And you’re table twenty . . .’

I look around the room and try to see my table, but I’m panicking too much to count them.

‘Felix.’ Rebecca puts her hand on my arm like she’s trying to make me relax. ‘It’s down there. Right at the other end.’

‘Thanks.’ I take a breath.

‘Felix, it’s okay. Don’t worry. It’s not all down to you; we’re a team, right?’

‘Right.’ I smile weakly, then weave my way between the rows of tables, checking the numbers like I’m at the cinema searching for my seat.

I stop when I reach table twenty. My opponent is already seated. I keep my head down, trying not to make eye contact with him until we shake hands. I glance around the hall. Everyone else has reached their tables and are sitting ready to play. Everyone except Rich, who’s grinning across the room, in my direction.

I look behind me, wondering if he’s seen a friend, or his mum and dad up in the gallery. But all there is behind me is a massive white wall.

What is he grinning at?

I think of smoothing my face for zits or checking my flies.

Someone clears his throat, then holds out his hand. I reach out and take it, and look my opponent in the eye. Wait. I’ve seen him before. He’s the boy I saw Rich talking to in the reception area. He holds onto my hand for too long. I try to pull it away. He lets go and his face cracks into a grin. He glances across the hall. I see Rich grinning back.

‘So,’ says my opponent. ‘What are you going to play, the Sicilian Defence?’ He laughs.

My heart jumps like a rabbit. Rich has told him the moves I use. It’s a setup. They’ve fixed it. My head begins to throb. I don’t know what to do. I want to get out of here, but I’m trapped, like I’m stuck in a cave in Tomb Raider with the walls closing in.

I stare across at Rich.

I thought we were here to win. I thought we were on the same team!

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Tick, Tick, Tick

My opponent picks up a white pawn, then a black, and puts them behind his back.

This isn’t right. This isn’t right.

I look up at the viewing areas, see loads of parents, but not mine, just my granddad staring at me with Jake beside him eating a packet of crisps.

Rich has told him my moves. Help me! I try to transmit this thought across the hall. But Granddad stares ahead and Jake keeps munching.