Oh my God. Hi! I didn't recognize you. Jeez you look so different! Jesus Christ! This is insane. I can't believe how different you look! Maybe it's me, but fuckin' A!

Well, something's different. I thought you wore glasses. Or your teeth. Or are you using Pantene? Is it a makeover or something? Did you go on one of those talk shows or something? No it's just so drastic!

So you're still here. I would have thought you left by now. I mean the party, not the city.

Are you sure you didn't get a haircut? It looks different. It just seems fluffier or something. Hm? No, I don't wash my hair anymore. I just rinse it. At first it was dirty, but then it became cleaner than if you use shampoo because if you think that shampoo cleans your hair, it doesn't. Shampoo is full of bleach and detergents that permanently strip your hair of important oils and then in a few years you experience aggressive balding.

So you came all dressed up for the film premiere party! That's so cute because if you knew this scene you'd always really dress down. We're probably just jaded.

It's insane in there. I'm working for Scorsese. You know, he secretly bankrolled Kill Fee. Anyway, I'm just helping them out with publicity and packaging. I've just been here since five so I'm leaving early. And I'm waking up early to go on a ten-mile bike ride and need my sleep. I'm a morning person.

Hey Uma! Hey Ethan! I'll be right over!

Are you here alone? Trawling around the film scene, huh? Right right. Trolling around the film scene. Trawling trolling around. Yeah, everyone is clamoring for a part of the indie film pie. This is sort of a weird party for that, but . . . you know, maybe you'll get a chance to show off a script to some hungry producer, or at least sleep with one! Hah! You crazy, funny weirdo!

Were you invited to the screening or were you just invited to the afterparty? Oh. Well, Sam was amazing. He just looks so luminous on film. His role in this I think is going to put him on the map as "one to watch." But no worries, I'm sure he'd still be friendly to someone like you.

Greta was here! She couldn't handle the crowd. You know how she is. She just likes to connect with people one on one. By the way, how is Carl?

You did?

Aw, wow. I'm so sorry.

I'm sorry you're dealing with that. Oh that sucks shit.

I sort of saw that coming.

No I mean.

Anyway, sweetie, really? That must be such a world of hurt for you.

To have seen it coming.

Lenny, hey! The band is warming up now.