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Back The Realistic Joneses Save as PDF
Chapters (19)
  1. Cover
  2. Title Page
  3. Dedication
  4. Acknowledgments
  5. Production History
  6. Characters
  7. Scene 1
  8. Scene 2
  9. Scene 3
  10. Scene 4
  11. Scene 5
  12. Scene 6
  13. Scene 7
  14. Scene 8
  15. Scene 9
  16. Scene 10
  17. Scene 11
  18. Scene 12
  19. About the Author

BOB: He seemed all right. He said I should say hi.

PONY: Hi. (Very brief pause) Maybe you can help me with something.

BOB: What? I mean, sure.

PONY: I don’t know what you’d call it. (She presses her hand flat onto his chest) Self-improvement? But don’t get the wrong idea.

BOB: What’s the wrong idea?

PONY: Why do you care what the wrong idea is?

BOB: I don’t. I just didn’t want to be having it.

(Lights fade. They exit together.

John walks uneasily through Jennifer and Bob’s darkened backyard.)

Scene 10

Scene 10

Morning. Gray skies. Jennifer and Bob’s backyard, porch. Jennifer, seated, with her purse and a sweater. Bob is working on a ship-in-a-bottle, with a screwdriver and a knitting needle. Pony is there, with a backpack.

PONY: This is exciting. I mean, not exciting, exactly— God, I have such a scientific mind. But, it’ll be fun.

BOB: It’s going to be great. We go to the fair every year. We didn’t go last year.

JENNIFER: You said you’d had enough.

BOB: I underestimated.

PONY: I didn’t know you did ships-in-bottles.

BOB: I’m actually trying to get it out.

JENNIFER: He thinks it’s an antique.

BOB: I said it might be.

PONY: Why don’t you just leave it in there?

BOB: Well, you know, it’s like, why don’t certain people climb Mt. Everest?

JENNIFER: Oh, listen to this, so Bob got us all tickets to the concert at the college tonight.

BOB: I wasn’t able to get those.

JENNIFER: You said you did. In those exact words.

BOB: I know. It’s disappointing.

PONY: That’s all right. What was it, a marching band or something?

JENNIFER: The symphony. We should get going. Where’s John?

PONY: He’s coming. He went for a walk.

BOB (Working on the bottle): He likes walking, I guess. There’s some little thing you turn to collapse the sails. Anyway, I’ll put this aside. That looks like a good backpack.

PONY: Yeah, John, um— it’s from a store.

JENNIFER: I’m going to get some waters. (To Bob) Do you want a water?

PONY: No, thanks.

JENNIFER: I was asking Bob.

BOB: I’m all right. (Jennifer goes inside) I was pretending everything was normal.

PONY: Everything is normal.

BOB: Good.

PONY: So, yeah— I don’t need to talk about the other night. And the other mornings.

BOB: Good.

PONY: It was one of those momentary things, spread out over a little while. And I felt sorry for you, a little.

BOB: You didn’t have to do that.

PONY: No, it felt good. Feeling sorry for you.

BOB: Yeah? I’m glad.