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Back The Realistic Joneses Save as PDF
Chapters (19)
  1. Cover
  2. Title Page
  3. Dedication
  4. Acknowledgments
  5. Production History
  6. Characters
  7. Scene 1
  8. Scene 2
  9. Scene 3
  10. Scene 4
  11. Scene 5
  12. Scene 6
  13. Scene 7
  14. Scene 8
  15. Scene 9
  16. Scene 10
  17. Scene 11
  18. Scene 12
  19. About the Author

JENNIFER: We can sit by the lake, on the way back.

BOB: That might be good.

JENNIFER: If you want. (Sound of a hot-air balloon approaching; that is, the periodic sound of the burner. Looking up) Oh, look. I forgot. They’re having that balloon festival, this weekend. God. Wouldn’t you love to go up in one of those?

BOB (Also looking up): And just kind of float above it all? No.

JENNIFER (Still looking up at the balloon moving past): It must be so quiet when it isn’t noisy.

BOB: I don’t see why they have to be such bright colors.

JENNIFER: They’re hot-air balloons, Bob.

BOB: Understood. It just seems like a lot of color. (Very brief pause) We should get going.

(He exits. Jennifer looks at the balloons for a moment, grabs Bob’s coffee cup, then exits.

Lights down.)

Scene 5

Scene 5

Daytime. Pony and John’s kitchen. Pony is seated at their new kitchen table, which is clearly used, doing some paperwork, looking through some catalogs related to her greeting card business, checking something on her laptop computer, etc. John enters, fills a coffee mug with water, adds some instant drink mix.

PONY: People don’t really send greeting cards, anymore.

JOHN: You always sell some in the wintertime, though.

PONY: I should do something else. (Referring to his instant drink) That stuff is gross.

JOHN: The drink I’m about to enjoy, right now? Yeah.

PONY: I wish I drank coffee.

JOHN: Why?

PONY: Because then I’d have a coffee. And I’d go, “Mmm. This is good coffee,” and I’d look out a window. And I’d be somebody else.

JOHN: So start drinking coffee.

PONY (Brief pause): It seems like you’re rustling around, every night.

JOHN: Am I waking you up?

PONY: No, but can you do your breathing somewhere else?

JOHN: What?

PONY: Whatever you’re doing in the bathroom. It’s like panting or something.

JOHN: Oh. Sorry. Yeah— it’s this deep-breathing thing. I didn’t think you heard that.

PONY: I do. It sounds like you’re crying.

JOHN: Come on— do I look like someone who leans on the sink and cries all night? (Brief pause) No, it’s for relaxation.

PONY: What do you need to relax about? Me?

JOHN: No, come on. Just, moving, work, just life.

PONY: You don’t care about that stuff.

JOHN: I know.

PONY: I can do it with you, if you want. The exercises. (Brief pause) That pottery studio had a sign out front for an apprentice.

JOHN: That’d be fun. Pottery’s great. (Holds up his coffee mug) This thing is pottery.

PONY: Could we not talk about pottery, for one second? (Brief pause) I always think a different place is going to feel different.

JOHN: Yeah.

PONY: I feel like I should go to med school or get my hair cut or something.

JOHN: I know.