JD: A mix of early 2000s and classic rock. Thoughts?

RB: Sounds like the only music I can stand. So far, so good.

RB: I’ll make sure to wear a choker and bring an inflatable plastic chair.

JD: I’ll spike my hair.

JD: How’s your Wednesday night going?

RB: It’s only Wednesday? This week is dragging, but today has been pretty good. I can’t complain.

JD: Glad to hear it.

JD: Do you have any ground rules for texting? It feels more personal than emails, so wanted to do a quick vibe check.

JD: Are road trip snack discussions allowed?

RB: Snack discussions are always permitted.

RB: As for rules… No pictures of our faces until we meet in person. Photos of food and screenshots are totally fine. Send me all the memes you can find.

JD: So you don’t want to know how handsome I am yet.

JD: Got it.

RB: Cocky, I see.

RB: No sharing specifics about work or names of friends.

RB: If things go south and we void our agreement, we don’t know who was on the other side.

JD: Total anonymity.

JD: That makes it easier to walk away.

JD: I’m not saying I want to walk away or anything, by the way.

RB: I understand what you mean.

RB: It should go without saying, but no sexually explicit photos or conversations either.

JD: Don’t worry.

JD: It never even crossed my mind.

RB: Ouch.

JD: Not what I meant. I’m looking forward to getting to know you. And what you like.

JD: Fuck. Not in a sexual way. I’m not going to send you a dick pic. That’s so tacky. I didn’t mean to imply I wouldn’t want to send one to you. I’m sure you’re an attractive woman.

JD: Oh my God, I will never speak again.

RB: Wow.

RB: I was just messing with you, but that was kind of funny.

JD: I’m almost having a meltdown, RB.

JD: My face has never been this red.

RB: Thanks for the comedic relief.

RB: I’ve had to cancel a few contracts because the man thought I was an actual… you know.

RB: Let me be clear, I have zero qualms about men and women who do that as a profession.

RB: It’s just not what I’m promoting, and I don’t want anyone to get the wrong idea or have false expectations.

JD: When you put it that way, I can understand.

JD: I’m sure that required some uncomfortable conversations and end up in some unsolicited images.

RB: Should you feel inclined to send me an unprompted dick pic, it will be shown to my friends and thoroughly analyzed.

RB: And then promptly made fun of.

JD: Hold off on the dick pics. I can do that.

RB: I don’t get creeper vibes from you.