I’d talked myself into a corner where the only logical move I had left was to follow someone else’s instructions. I passed the handset over, and let Lily top me up with wine while Faith did whatever it was she planned to do.

‘Have you told Rowan?’ Lily asked, her voice low, as though shielding the question.

‘No. He didn’t tell me about the girl – girls, who even knows. I haven’t mentioned the online dates either. But I don’t think, like, I can’t imagine that when he suggested this, he thought this would be how it shaped up,’ I explained and Lily nodded along. ‘I don’t know how he’ll react to something like this.’

‘Okay, babes. But … you do know that not knowing someone’s reaction to something isn’t a reason not to tell them whatever the thing is? Especially if they’re your partner, actually. Like, I know you have us lot, and we’re here for anything. But Rowan should also be a kind of go-to person for the big stuff.’

‘You think I should tell him?’

Lily kissed my temple. ‘I think you should consider telling him that you’re dating people. Because I think Rowan needs to know this isn’t one-sided. Whether you tell him one of the people you’re dating is a woman? Well …’ Lily glanced over at Faith who was typing furiously. ‘For now, though, you’re in her capable hands. And you can trust Faith when it comes to dating women because she’s definitely better at it than Rowan is.’

‘Damn straight I am.’ She handed me the phone back. ‘She’s on WhatsApp. She’s gorgeous.’

‘Lemme see.’ Lily snatched at it before I could. ‘Oh, Edi. You have done well.’

‘Right? I’m a little jealous, Parcell.’

‘Shut up, the pair of you,’ I warned. But I couldn’t keep a straight face. I grabbed the phone back from Lily and looked at the conversation screen, which had been taken over by a picture of Fred. Her hair was loose, messy but in that chic way, and she looked to be mid-laugh. Christ, I thought as I clicked into the conversation proper, I hope I can make her laugh like that. I read the text twice over – Hi, it’s Edi from the museum. Still putting together that list on where to meet people. How does Benny’s sound? – and I smiled. ‘Thank you.’

‘You’re welcome.’

‘Oh, fuck, the ticks went blue.’ I dropped the phone. ‘The ticks went blue.’ I leaned over the worktop to look at the screen. ‘She’s online. She’s online and she’s typing.’

Faith laughed and went to the oven. ‘Lil, I’m getting this pizza out. Check the fridge for more wine?’

Lily’s glass was midway to her mouth but she paused and glanced at me. ‘Christ, she’ll need it.’

Chapter 21