‘No, no you’re right.’ She sounded pensive, then. ‘Boys keep tallies of the number of women they’ve slept with, not the number of times they’ve slept with them.’

‘Bollocks.’

‘I didn’t realise you were with Lily.’

Faith laughed. ‘What gave it away?’

‘I’m just saying it’s bollocks and Edi can count whatever she wants. And that women can—’

‘Beautiful Lily,’ I interrupted her, ‘I know whatever one can do the other can do, but, before we get into a chorus about it, could we deal with the reason I actually called?’

‘Yes, beautiful Lily, can we?’ Faith parroted. ‘Edi, what’s your worry? That you’re not being straight with her?’

Lily snorted and then apologised. ‘Sorry, caught me off guard.’

‘But I’m not being straight with her, am I?’

‘You’re right. In my experience with women, they hate to know the people they’re sleeping with aren’t sleeping with other people. Worse still, they hate-hate it when the people they’re sleeping with aren’t in a relationship with someone else, that’s a real kick in the proverbial.’ Faith’s tone was deadpan. ‘In case my tone didn’t give it away—’

‘Oh, it gave it away,’ I said.

‘Are you worried she’ll want a relationship now?’ Lily asked.

‘I think so?’ I guessed. ‘I think that’s a worry. But I’m also worried that she’ll think I’ll want a relationship, and then she’ll freak out.’

‘Which you don’t?’ she clarified.

‘No. No, I don’t think … I mean, I just had one. A big one. And Fred is amazing but …’ I half-laughed; it was more like letting out a puff of air. ‘Everyone is in the beginning, aren’t they? I think I just want time to enjoy being … Edi.’

‘Okay, so if you don’t want a relationship, and you tell her that you don’t want a relationship …’ Faith chimed in again. ‘What is there for anyone to freak out about?’

‘But …’ I paused. There was a thump in my forehead knocking at regular intervals.

‘Babe, but nothing. Fred isn’t Rowan.’

A long silence followed her announcement. The thump in my temple stopped being a thump and became a constant pain, so I took myself to the kitchen and rifled through drawers until I found paracetamol. ‘Give me a second,’ I said, but I was already setting the phone down. I picked Faith (and Lily) up again when I’d thrown two tablets down my throat.

‘Are you okay?’ Lily asked.