‘Thank you, you scrub up pretty well yourself.’ I stepped aside, then, and nodded him along the hallway. ‘Come on, don’t stand on ceremony for me.’ It had only been days since we’d seen each other but somehow it felt longer. I wondered whether he actually looked different, or whether I only thought he did now I was seeing him in a different light. Have you lost weight? I thought as I walked close behind him. Have you swapped … ‘You smell different.’

He sniffed the sleeve of his jacket. ‘Do I?’ I saw his eyes stretch and then narrow, and I wondered what he’d just realised. ‘Weird.’ He hurried to take the garment off and dropped it over the back of his chair. ‘Probably Ian or Monty.’

I murmured in agreement and then turned around to check the oven. It had only been minutes and I knew the bread wouldn’t be done. But I didn’t want him to see my face. ‘I’ve thrown together a beef casserole, maybe a stew, definitely something with beef.’ I laughed as I closed the oven door. ‘Wine?’ Rowan had put the bottle on the table and the chill of it was starting to drip off.

‘Beer?’

‘Of course.’ I grabbed a bottle from the fridge and, when I put the drink down for him, I pulled the bottle of wine back for me. It was a screw top, and the Lily in me wanted to undo the lid and chug half down in one go. But instead, I turned around to grab a glass. ‘Are you hungry?’

‘Aren’t I always?’

‘Okay, well there’s definitely enough to feed at least six people in that pot.’

He laughed. ‘Which sounds about right for you, for making dinner for two.’

It felt familiar; this old knowledge of each other. My expression softened as the wine sloshed into the glass. ‘I have issues with measurements, what can I say?’ I turned with the drink in my hand, then, and Rowan nodded towards it.

‘I can see that.’

‘What?’ I looked down. ‘It’s a large glass of wine.’

He pushed the flowers towards me. ‘Don’t forget those.’

‘Thank you. They’re really lovely, Rowan, thank you.’ And just like that we went back to the forged politeness of people who needed to talk about something, but weren’t yet ready to. I dropped the flowers into a pint glass and filled it with water. My politeness only stretched so far before my nerves took over.

Unprompted, then, while I was still facing away, Rowan started to tell me what had been happening in his life. There was so much information packed in that it felt like the updates stretched beyond the few days we hadn’t spoken for; I realised, then, how little we must have talked even when we’d actually been talking.