‘Edi, babe.’ She craned into the front of the car to hug me at an awkward angle. ‘Why didn’t you tell us?’

‘Because she didn’t want us to think he was an utter bastard,’ Lily answered, deadpan.

‘He was so sorry.’ And he really had been. The weeks and months after Skye were, strangely, some of the happiest we’d had. Every promise Rowan made – every night out with the girls, lunch with my parents, shopping trip, weekend away – he came good on. At the time it didn’t even feel like he was serving a punishment, only being kind. ‘He did his time for it, or, I don’t know, he did some time for it. I think if it happened again now …’ I trailed off and a half-laugh, half-huff escaped out of me. ‘Which of course it won’t, because now he doesn’t need to cheat, now he can just walk right out there, pick up a woman, and tell me about it over the dinner that I make for him the evening after.’ I felt a riptide of anger move through my belly with such a force that my hand flew to my core. ‘At the time he blamed it on being young and stupid.’ Another huff fell out of me. ‘I don’t know what his excuse is now.’

‘Hey.’ Cora rested a hand on my shoulder. ‘Babe, you okay?’

‘He was just so sorry.’

Lily reached over to squeeze my knee, then. ‘Try to breathe for me, would you?’

And all three of us sucked the air right out of the car together, and exhaled it back out.

‘Anyone need a wee break, or you know, a McDonald’s?’ We were hurtling towards a sign that marked up the next service stop as being three miles away. ‘Cora? You must have a stonking head still – don’t you think food would help?’

Cora licked her finger and then held it upright, as though assessing the winds of probability in the car. ‘Yeah, yeah, I feel like I could go for some fries. Side of mozzarella sticks, maybe. McFlurry, too, if you’re offering.’

‘I’m offering to pull over is what I’m offering.’

‘Fine, whatever, my treat for Hamish,’ Cora joked in answer then added, ‘Mind you, out of this secret swap I feel very short-changed. Mine is infinitely more embarrassing than yours.’

‘When Edi was seventeen she got so drunk that she weed herself on the way to a bush that she’d actually planned on weeing in.’

‘Lily!’ I slapped her arm. ‘I can’t believe you told her that.’

‘Oh come on, she’s sleeping with Hamish, we’ve got to give the girl something.’