Back The Best of Simple
Chapters (76)
  1. Title Page
  2. Copyright Notice
  3. Dedication
  4. Foreword: Who Is Simple?
  5. Feet Live Their Own Life
  6. Landladies
  7. Simple Prays A Prayer
  8. Conversation on the Corner
  9. Simple on Indian Blood
  10. A Toast to Harlem
  11. Simple and His Sins
  12. Temptation
  13. Wooing the Muse
  14. Vacation
  15. Letting off Steam
  16. Jealousy
  17. Banquet in Honor
  18. A Veteran Falls
  19. High Bed
  20. Final Fear
  21. There Ought to be a Law
  22. Income Tax
  23. No Alternative
  24. Springtime
  25. Last Whipping
  26. Seeing Double
  27. Simple on Military Integration
  28. Blue Evening
  29. A Letter from Baltimore
  30. Seven Rings
  31. What Can a Man Say?
  32. Empty Room
  33. Picture for Her Dresser
  34. Cocktail Sip
  35. Apple Strudel
  36. Bop
  37. Formals and Funerals
  38. Fancy Free
  39. Midsummer Madness
  40. Morals Is Her Middle Name
  41. They Come and They Go
  42. A Million—and One
  43. Two Loving Arms
  44. All in the Family
  45. Kick for Punt
  46. Subway to Jamaica
  47. No Tea for the Fever
  48. Boys, Birds, and Bees
  49. On the Warpath
  50. A Hearty Amen
  51. Must Have a Seal
  52. Shadow of the Blues
  53. Once in a Wife-time
  54. Present for Joyce
  55. Christmas Song
  56. Tied in a Bow
  57. Sometimes I Wonder
  58. Four Rings
  59. Simply Love
  60. Bang-up Big End
  61. Duty Is Not Snooty
  62. Bones, Bombs, Chicken Necks
  63. A Dog Named Trilby
  64. Enter Cousin Minnie
  65. Radioactive Red Caps
  66. Two Sides Not Enough
  67. Puerto Ricans
  68. Minnie Again
  69. Vicious Circle
  70. Again Cousin Minnie
  71. Name in Print
  72. Minnie One More Time
  73. An Auto-Obituary
  74. Jazz, Jive, and Jam
  75. About the Author
  76. Newsletter Sign-up

“‘Your mother sent you here?’

“‘My mama does not know I am gone,’ he said. ‘I ran away.’

“‘Well, how come you run here?’

“‘Because you’re my favorite cousin. I got your address from Uncle George William. I’ve heard tell of you all my life, Cousin Jess. Folks at home’re always talking about you. And I never will forget that hard big-league ball you bought me when I was five years old, and you came home on that visit. I broke my mama’s lamp with it and got whipped within an inch of my life. But I never did blame you for it—like the rest of them did. I sure am glad to see you now, Cousin Jess. Howdy!’

“‘Set down,’ I said. He set. ‘On what did you come here—hitch-hike?’

“‘No, sir. Train. I didn’t dream of getting to New York, Cousin Jess, wasn’t even thinking of it. But I’ve been wanting to come, ever since my step-father raw-hided me. Then when Mama Mattie just keeps on telling me I’m just like my father, no-good, I was thinking of running away to Norfolk and joining the navy, till somebody told me I wasn’t old enough without my parents’ consent. Then I thought I’d run as far as Baltimore maybe before frost sets in. But all this was just kind of vague in my mind. Then, last night, I was hanging around the station watching the trains come in and the girls eating ice-cream cones when a colored man got off the streamliner from the North and he said to me, Here, boy, here is a ticket for you. The rest of this here round-trip, I do not want it. Use it, sell it, tear it up, or give it away. I don’t care.

“‘I looked at it and saw that it was a ticket to New York—a great long yellow ticket. I said, Aren’t you going back up North?

“‘The man said, I been up North. They comes and they goes. You go.

“‘He cut out and left me standing there on the train platform with the ticket in my hand. So when the night train came along in a few minutes heading North, I got on. Here I am.’

“‘Here you is, all right,’ I said.

“‘I always did want to come North, Cousin Jess, so I come to you—’

“‘Don’t get me confused with the North! I ain’t the North.’

“‘And I always wanted to see New York and—’

“‘My room ain’t New York. Out yonder is New York.’

“‘You are all the Harlem I knew to come to, so—’

“‘Excuse me from being Harlem, because I ain’t. Where are you going to sleep? Also eat?’ I said. ‘How are you going to live?’