Chapters (47)
- Cover
- Dedication
- MAN SHORTAGE
- ADVERSITY
- BABYLON
- MERINO WOOL
- THE MONEY
- IT’S ELECTRIC
- MR. MEME
- HALFWAY IN LOVE
- THE DRY HUMPING
- BAD WEREWOLF PORN
- ACTION OVER DELIBERATION
- BUTTERMILK PIE
- SEVEN LIFETIMES
- THE HOTEL WASHINGTON TREATY
- BULL VS. COW
- ONE OF THOSE “NO” WOMEN
- MODERN WOMAN
- PLUS-ONE
- DESPITE APPEARANCES
- LOVEMAKING PRACTICE
- ENTANGLED
- CAT GIFS
- BROWN, BUT NOT TOO DARK
- CHEAT CODE
- BOILED POTATOES
- SELF-CHECKOUT
- BETTER JUDGMENT
- 8:15
- TWO TYPES OF PEOPLE
- OUTSIDE THE TENT
- OFF THE RAILS
- DATU
- CLOSED CIRCUIT
- TROJAN HORSE
- MISTER
- JOHN WAYNE
- REFINING FIRE
- EPILOGUE
- ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
- NIKKI PAYNE
- DISCUSSION QUESTIONS
- Excerpt from SEX, LIES AND SENSIBILITY
- TL;DR
- About the Author
- What’s next onyour reading list?
Liza pulled homemade decorations out of the box, and Granny slowly shifted her attention. All of Liza’s, Maurice’s, Janae’s, and LeDeya’s childhood ornaments and Christmas notes came pouring out of the box. Dorsey stood apart from everyone, sometimes pacing, sometimes looking at the door.
Liza took great pains to ignore him. One long look would have her family on high alert. She picked up the delicate ornaments and threw them haphazardly on the tree. Dorsey seemed to curl into himself, overfocusing on tiny tasks like tinsel placement and ornament distribution instead of talking to people. She went behind him and repositioned every perfectly placed ornament he had put on.
“That’s not evenly distributed,” Dorsey complained.
“Neither is wealth,” Liza quipped. “I’m putting the ornaments on the side of the tree that people actually see.”
“Yes, the Instagrammable shot,” Dorsey shot back.
Another knock on the door had all the women in the house rolling their eyes.
“Are you guys expecting someone else?” David asked.
Liza sucked her teeth. “Yes . . . yes, we are.”
“Colin!” Bev’s high-pitched false enthusiasm nearly shattered the glasses.
Dorsey’s face was a mask of confusion, so much so that Liza rushed to explain.
“He’s my play cousin,” Liza said.
His eyes widened. “What the hell is a play cousin?”
“A family friend you grew up with that’s not related but feels related,” LeDeya said and stepped between Dorsey and Liza toward the foyer to give Colin a decidedly fake hug.
“So, why not just say friend of the family?” Dorsey asked, genuinely curious.
“Because this fool is no friend of mine,” Liza stage-whispered and walked to the door as well. She attempted to give him a passing church hug, but Colin pulled her in and gave her a squeeze so aggressive that Liza was short of breath. He had beefed up since his skinny days in Longbourne Gardens. He had a face cut right above generic, but his green eyes turned a bland face into a striking one, as they were set in deep contrast to the brown of his skin. He handed them all signed copies of his book.
“I wrote a personal note in there for all of you,” Colin said. “Oh, Liza, you ladies are somehow more lovely than those Instagram pics.” He let Liza go and let his round eyes settle on Janae.
Bev walked hastily to David and introduced him to Colin. “This is David, Janae’s man.”
Colin’s face fell visibly as he gave David a limp handshake. He then turned to Dorsey, and his face lit up again.