Margaret was quiet for a moment. ‘I guess . . .’ She made some noises with her mouth, but she knew almost straight away, almost before Diane had finished asking the question. ‘I’m lonely,’ she said. She was so close to telling her about the Tamagotchi phone. ‘I’m jealous. I guess I’m kind of slavering after what they have instead of looking at what I’ve got.’

‘And what do you have?’ Margaret was pretty sure Diane was making dinner. She could hear a tap being turned on and off. It occurred to her how lucky she was. That this woman would pick up the phone in the middle of making dinner and talk to her in a non-judgemental, non-emotional way in order to save both their lives. Margaret did it for other people. This was how it worked. You passed it on. Suddenly the equation came into focus.

‘You,’ Margaret said.

‘Yeah.’ She imagined Diane, phone between shoulder and ear – chopping.

‘Heidi and Bisi.’

‘Yeah.’

‘I’m sober.’

‘There you go.’

Margaret didn’t say anything.

‘Does anything you know about yourself or me suggest we can stay sober by ourselves?’

‘No,’ said Margaret. She could feel her body filling with a lightness.

‘Did we do anything to deserve to be sober that maybe someone else like us didn’t do?’

‘No,’ Margaret said. ‘I was an arsehole.’

‘I was a drunk arsehole one minute’ – Diane was eating something now, her mouth was full – ‘and the next minute I was sober.’

‘Yeah.’

‘I was a terrible person,’ Diane said. ‘I hurt everyone who came in contact with me.’

‘I smashed and burned everything that came near,’ Margaret said.

‘Grace,’ Diane said.

‘A gift unearned,’ Margaret said. The sun came out behind her. The room filled with a soft light, but inside Margaret it was blinding.

‘I’m sorry you’re so lonely,’ Diane said. ‘I imagine it’s really tough.’

‘Yeah,’ Margaret said.

‘I don’t know if you being alone is a bad thing or a good thing for you, I can’t judge that.’

‘Me neither.’

‘I just know there are lots of people left to help and if we can stay sober that would be great, because then we can help them.’ The tap was on again. ‘And for that grace to keep me sober, I can’t afford resentment. Some people can. I can’t.’

Margaret nodded. ‘Thanks.’

‘Thank you,’ said Diane.