Of course, these are strangers who might be madly in love. But they are sat more or less with their backs to each other and he has sighed every five minutes. Could I be staring at the view of mine and Ellis’s future? She has no reason to have any loyalty to me, and she even has some reasons to hate me, my travelling is one. I will miss a lot of midnight cries that she is going to have to deal with alone. I can imagine that causing some resentment. The thought of it makes me shudder.

Ellis thought it would be a good idea to set some clear boundaries in our relationship. A strictly co-parenting relationship. We decided that we have to keep the lines clear. We can’t indulge in a relationship because if things didn’t work between us it wouldn’t only affect the baby, but Jack as well. She doesn’t want him getting attached to me if I’m not always going to be around. When I tried to argue that I always would be, she pointed out how I travel so much already that I can’t make that promise. That stung. I know my job is going to create difficulties for us, but I don’t want to seem like less of an involved dad because of it.

I kept to myself that I’d be willing to try more than just co-parenting. Some selfish part of my brain wanted to push her into admitting that we could be great together, just like how we were before. But I don’t know if that’s true. As much as I like spending time with her and Jack, I don’t really know the woman she has become. I know she is strong and protective and her heart is hidden behind a hundred walls, but how can I tell her we would be perfect together if we haven’t been together in a decade? I don’t know if my nostalgia is making me want something that doesn’t exist any more. Maybe I’m delusional, but I can feel the chemistry between us. It isn’t all just sexual. And despite all of that, I want her to at least know that she can depend on me. That I’m not going to leave when things get rough.

In the corner opposite us sits the epitome of a happy couple. His hand has been rubbing circles on her large bump while she has been going through every baby name she can think of. I think they must be early twenties, with a youthful glow about them. I personally have hated every name she has suggested; you would think she was giving birth to a pensioner. I mean, is Gerald a real suggestion? The man seemed to very kindly shoot that down in a way that made it seem like it was her idea.