I think about how it might be time I ask about moving into the master suite with him.

Chapter Twenty-Four

Liam

This time last year fatherhood was not on my mind. I always hoped I would be a dad someday, but I never really thought it would happen. Now, here I am in the pick-up line at Jack’s school with the windows rolled down, blasting my cheesy Nineties boyband playlist with an easy smile.

Some of the other parents give me sideways glances but I pay them no mind, it feels right being here. Sun shining down on me as I wait for Jack to come out with the rest of his class, this has been my new routine since Ellis left the hospital.

Personally, I think fatherhood looks good on me. My mom said the same when she FaceTimed me yesterday. When I told her not to come up here after Ellis was put on bed rest, the only condition she had was that I had to call her every day with updates, even when there aren’t updates to give her. On those uneventful days she just wants to know about me and how I’m getting on. It’s the most I’ve talked to her in years, and she’s loving it. Even dad gets in once in a while to ask about hockey and offer random baby advice. His most recent piece was not to buy baby supplies until after the baby is born. It’s an old Russian superstition, but I had to break it to him that it’s far too late for that.

On quick little feet, Jack jogs over to the car and hops into his car seat. The first time I picked him up, I offered to strap him in. He looked at me like I was stupid and told me “I think I have more practice than you.”

He wasn’t wrong. I forget how grown up he is. Before I met him, I thought five-year-olds where basically toddlers, but Jack is a little human with opinions and the ability to strap himself into the car.

“Hey bud, how was school?” Normally he gives me a run through of every little thing he did and every thought he had, but today he just meets my eye in the rear-view mirror and shrugs.

“You okay?” I’m trying not to worry, but if something is wrong it will be my first Jack problem to possibly solve alone.

“Yeah.” Jack’s little voice is quiet, I’m not even sure he heard what I said, but if he isn’t ready to talk I’m not going to push him. Maybe I should wait until we get home and ask for Ellis’s input.

“Liam?” Jack asks after a while of driving.

“Yeah, bud?” The atmosphere in the car feels different than usual somehow. Heavier.