He looks surprised, opens his mouth, but doesn’t reply.

“Will’s going to be an artist,” Jane says. “You should see his drawings.”

I catch Amy’s eye. But, if she knows my secret, I know hers. She won’t tell them I was in his room, because I can tell them about the boy. Instead, she looks away, and I wonder how much longer I have to stay here.

If this was the other way around, Jay would be busting out the board games, and Mum would still be fretting. But I feel like a burden. No wonder the Pearces don’t have many guests. They’re terrible hosts.

When Chris turns the news on, we watch it in silence for ten minutes until I stand and say, “I should go. Thank you for having me.”

“You’re very welcome,” Jane says. “We’ll have to do it again sometime.”

I don’t believe her, but nod like I do.

“I’ll show you out,” Amy says.

Will and his dad don’t say anything.

“Thank you for coming,” Amy says. “I know it was a bit awkward, but I wanted to show you we’re normal…ish. What I did has nothing to do with them. And all those things you worried about…you shouldn’t have.”

She goes to touch my hand, but I pull it away. “I thought…”

Amy doesn’t need to finish the sentence because I thought it too. I thought we were more than friends because we kissed and it was great. And then, just as quick, I watched her do something unexplainable.

“What you did with that boy…please stop.”

Amy sighs. “I told you I’ll try.”

I feel disappointed and relieved at the same time because I like her, but I can’t do this. Maybe one day, but not yet. Love scares me more than I can explain, because, if you let it, you lose control. And there’s no telling where it will lead you.

While the gate slides back, I almost tell Amy I saw her brother’s drawings and that he was the one who carved them in my wardrobe. But she’s spent all night trying to convince me not to worry. I can’t tell her I’ve got the proof I was waiting for.

Instead, I smile and walk away, wondering with every step what to do with that proof and what it means for a family that is anything but normal.

54

They look like they always do—Jane on one side, Chris on the other, and Will in the middle. I’ve been home for less than five minutes, and, already, they’re back in their places.