‘A bit too close to home, then,’ he says.

‘Exactly,’ I reply. ‘The scene I got to was where she thinks her fiancé is cheating on her. It turns out he’s actually arranging for her dream wedding dress, but…’

‘Oh, okay, I can see why you don’t want to write this book any more.’

‘The worst thing is that I do want to write it. I just want to change the genre, make it so he is cheating on her, because that’s life. That happens.’

‘Not, like, switching to horror, then?’ he jokes.

‘Have her murder him halfway through…’

‘I’m worried you’re a little too into this, so I’m going to quickly steer the conversation in a different direction,’ he says. ‘I have a profile to think about now. I can’t be caught up in a murder.’

‘I meant in the book,’ I remind him with a smile.

‘I know, I know,’ he says. ‘So, what are you going to do?’

‘Start again,’ I say. ‘With something completely different. But what…?’

Abandoning my previous draft in favour of starting again means I absolutely am going to have to start writing while I’m on my not-quite honeymoon, or it really will be a stressful few weeks before my deadline. I really don’t need this pressure right now, and it’s not like having a regular day job where you can take holiday or be off sick. There’s no such luxury in this gig. No matter what’s going on in my personal life or how messed up my head is feeling, I have to write a book by a date.

For a moment, we pause.

I glance around the room for inspiration. The delicious smell of coffee, the delectable-looking cakes and pastries, the rustic wicker furniture all laid out with food and drinks… The only thing I’m feeling inspired to be is hungry.

I grab a biscotti and bite it meaningfully with frustration.

‘This is such a unique brand of writer’s block,’ I tell him, ‘because everything that’s going on is making it impossible to write about anything else.’

Freddie leans forward in his chair, straightening his back.

‘Okay, I have an idea for you,’ he says. ‘You ready?’

I nod. I get this a lot, people giving me their big ideas that they want credit for. They’re almost always terrible though.

‘So, to borrow a little from your idea, you’ve got this girl, right? And she’s about to get married, and she suspects her fiancé is cheating on her, and he is. The girl finds out on the morning of her wedding, and decides to go on her honeymoon on her own.’

‘I feel like this has been done before,’ I joke.

‘She arrives at the hotel where she meets a movie star, who she thinks is the barman… then her ex and his girlfriend turn up…’

‘OK, so this is what’s happening to me,’ I point out, although I know he knows.

‘Exactly,’ he replies. ‘You say you like to have a little bit of real life in your work. This is just a little bit more than usual. Think about it – it’s a great story.’