‘Oh,’ he replies.

‘Oh indeed,’ I say. ‘So I went to find the flowers and, just by pure chance, there he was, hiding behind a bloody bush, talking with her, about how they loved each other and blah blah blah.’

I’m a little sick of going over and over it now.

‘Lila, that’s so awful. I am so sorry. What an awful way to find out too.’

‘It was awful, but I feel so relieved I found out at all,’ I reply.

‘So no one had any idea?’

There’s a thought. I hadn’t considered whether any of our friends might know. I suppose Gerry, his best friend/best man could have been in on the secret. It makes sense that he would confide in someone and, now that I think about it, he must’ve provided him with a few cover stories from time to time. I wonder about the others in our friendship group. I’d bet my life there’s no way Ali would’ve known; she has no time for cheaters, which I really appreciate. That’s the way it should be, right? Whatever consenting adults want to get up to is absolutely fine, so long as everyone is happy with it and no one gets hurt.

There’s a sincerity in Freddie’s voice. Halfway through that, I worried I might regret telling him as soon as I’d got the words out, but I’m glad I did. It’s nice to talk about it, or perhaps it’s not nice to talk about it, but it is just nice to talk to someone generally.

‘Thanks,’ I say.

‘You get much work done?’ he asks me, changing the subject.

‘I did not,’ I admit.

‘I’m sorry,’ he says. ‘I’m not doing a very good job of cheering you up, am I?’

‘No, but the crisps are,’ I joke.

‘It’s nice to see you smile,’ he says. ‘That first night, when we met, you seemed so happy. You did think you were in with a bartender, though, I suppose.’

‘Yeah, I’m sorry if I was a bit weird. That was my wedding day, actually. I came straight here.’

‘Wow, so this is all still pretty raw, then,’ he says. ‘Tell you what, I was going to have another stab at seeing if you wanted to go for dinner with me, but I totally get why you might want to be by yourself now. So I’m going to leave you, and if you want some company, just shout, okay?’

‘Okay, thanks,’ I reply.

‘And thanks for the chips,’ he says, heading back over to his side of the garden. ‘I’m going to need to swim for another hour now.’

I smile at him, even though he’s walking away.

Freddie can’t help but hide that he feels sorry for me – I’d feel sorry for me too, so I can’t be annoyed by his pity.

It might be nice to have someone to have dinner with… but I just can’t. I can’t bring myself to go for dinner with a man; it doesn’t feel right. And I know that he isn’t romantically interested in me. I mean, look at him. He looks like a Greek god and I look like a Greek vase.