My eyes don’t close. I think they might be afraid to so I look at the slice of sky on view through the slit in the curtains. It’s just a peek at space but it settles me to know how big the world is. How unimportant I am. To that bright star twinkling in the far distance, I am not even visible. This brings comfort to me. Reminding me that nothing I do actually matters. Slowly I close my eyes and let peace float through my mind. It warms my body. I feel sleepy; my mind is closing down for the night. Maybe I’ll dream of Andriu.

Chapter Twelve

Then

‘You get it,’ I say, shoving a bunch of towels into the washing machine. Tara’s dad was here earlier while we were at college. He fixed the washing machine because it wouldn’t empty properly and he also put some light bulbs where they were badly needed around the house. He’s really handy like that, which is why he has a key. We can just ring him and the next day the problem is solved. He even cleaned the spare room for us when Robin left last month. Robin was a friend of a friend from college who had moved in two months earlier, a couple of weeks after we did. Then she had done a runner without paying the rent. It took a while for us to realise she had actually gone because it wasn’t unusual for her to disappear for a few days. I only became suspicious when I knocked on her door for the third time that week and got no answer. I was pissed off at first but when Tara walked in and saw the room had been cleared out she started to laugh and couldn’t stop. Then I started to laugh. We both fell onto the small bed and laughed until we couldn’t laugh anymore.

Tara goes to open the front door. Today we met three possible housemates to take Robin’s room: a girl out of Tara’s history class; a food delivery guy who’s over here studying English from Spain and up for consideration because he said he could get us free takeaways; and the third girl, Annemarie, who works in college administration. She’s probably the best candidate; she’s our age, seems to be a bit of fun and who knows when we might need someone in administration on our side.

‘Faye.’

I lift my gaze from the machine settings and look to where Tara is standing in the doorway.

‘One more,’ she says, her eyes alight with excitement as she pulls a face.

‘One more what?’ I say, lifting the linen basket to bring it back upstairs. When I see the body walking into the kitchen behind Tara I drop it again and quickly push my hair off my face.