‘Was. We’ve been divorced over ten years. Kids stayed with her. All local so I see them regularly.’

‘So whose are the babies?’

‘Come with me,’ he said, and gestured that I should follow him to a room at the back of the house. Heather’s voice saying ‘axe murderer’ rang in my head and I cursed that I hadn’t let her come with me.

Kevin opened a door with a flourish and I went through to find myself in a room with four large glass tanks. This was the source of the smell and it was overpowering.

‘This is my hobby,’ he said, ‘my passion. Come and meet Mungo.’

He led me over to a tank in the corner where I spotted a red and orange snake looking back at us.

‘Christ! What is that?’

‘No need to be scared. He won’t bite.’

‘These are your babies?’ I asked incredulously, as I looked at the other tanks to check that they all had lids on them.

‘Yep. Mungo’s a corn snake. Want to hold him? Or feed him – do that and he’ll be your friend for life.’ He reached into a bin in the corner and lifted out a dead mouse.

‘No thanks.’

Kevin lifted the lid of Mungo’s tank and dropped in the mouse. ‘Come on. Meet the others.’

I moved along to the next tank. This time, I could see a grey-green snake with a white stripe curled up in the corner.

‘That’s Basher. He’s a garter snake, and there’s Rollo,’ Kevin said as he pointed at the third tank, in which there was a brown snake with beige patches.

‘Yes, very handsome,’ I said in an attempt to sound enthusiastic.

‘Isn’t he? He’s a ball python. And lastly, there’s Slinky.’

‘Good name for a snake,’ I said as I looked into the last tank, where there was a brown snake with what looked like black circles drawn on him.

‘He’s a rainbow boa. And I have a tarantula in the bathroom. Sidney. Want to see him?’

‘Er … no thanks. I’m not keen on spiders. Maybe later.’ Maybe never, I thought, and resolved not to go to the loo. Why oh why didn’t I arrange for a phone call from Heather to give me a get-out clause if I needed one? I needed an excuse – and fast – to get out of there as soon as possible.

We went back into the kitchen and had a bland-tasting quiche with a bit of tomato and lettuce, while Kevin gave me a fascinating talk about snakes and their habits.

‘And for pudding,’ he said as he got up and went to a drawer. ‘Ta-dah.’ He produced a packet of Liquorice Allsorts. ‘I remembered how you loved these back in the day. We both did. Remember?’