‘Better than laudanum, I suppose.’

‘I reckon he’d have tried that if it had been available.’

‘So why’s he even on the list? You had enough of addiction problems with Joe.’

I shrugged. ‘Because people change and I doubt he’s still smoking dope thirty years on. You never know where life has taken him since. He had potential.’

‘I thought it was worth checking him out, even if it’s just to eliminate him, and we did have a pact that, if we were still single at fifty, we’d hook up again.’

‘You’re kidding? It has to be him then.’

‘I doubt if he even remembers.’

‘You never know. Kevin Grisham?’

‘He was a sweetie.’

‘Sweetie? Sounds a bit wet to me.’

‘Well, he was only fifteen when I knew him and he did sound more confident when I spoke to him.’

‘Might be an axe murderer then.’

‘Thanks for that. I’m meeting him on Saturday.’

‘Want me to come with you?’

‘I’ll be fine.’

37

Bea’s been in touch. I wonder if she suspects that it’s me who sent her the flowers and the box. Is it time to reveal myself? Almost. In the meantime, maybe I’ll woo Bea some more. Now … what to send her next? Balloons? No. More flowers? No. Maybe I should google romantic gifts? I got out my laptop and did just that. There were websites that had all sorts of suggestions.

A hamper. No. That’s what you get an aunt for Christmas.

A crate of beer. I don’t think so.

Make-up. That could be misinterpreted, like I am saying she needs some. I did learn a couple of things from being married.

A book a month to be delivered.

A keychain with co-ordinate charms that lead to my address. No.

A key to my heart. Too soppy.

A puppy, kitten, goldfish. She might not thank me for any of those, though I know she’s an animal lover. There will be time for all that later; that is, if she’ll have me in her life.

I’ll have a think. This is important. We’ll be making memories, Bea and I, and whatever I send will be part of our story.

38