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Chapters (77)
  1. Landing Page
  2. A TERRIBLE KINDNESS
  3. Dedication
  4. Contents
  5. ABERFAN
  6. 1
  7. 2
  8. 3
  9. 4
  10. 5
  11. 6
  12. 7
  13. 8
  14. 9
  15. 10
  16. 11
  17. CAMBRIDGE CHOIR
  18. 12
  19. 13
  20. 14
  21. 15
  22. 16
  23. 17
  24. 18
  25. 19
  26. 20
  27. 21
  28. 22
  29. 23
  30. 24
  31. 25
  32. 26
  33. 27
  34. 28
  35. 29
  36. 30
  37. FAMILY BUSINESS
  38. 31
  39. 32
  40. 33
  41. 34
  42. 35
  43. 36
  44. 37
  45. 38
  46. 39
  47. 40
  48. 41
  49. 42
  50. 43
  51. 44
  52. 45
  53. 46
  54. 47
  55. 48
  56. 49
  57. MIDNIGHT CHOIR
  58. 50
  59. 51
  60. 52
  61. 53
  62. 54
  63. 55
  64. 56
  65. 57
  66. 58
  67. ABERFAN
  68. 59
  69. 60
  70. 61
  71. 62
  72. 63
  73. 64
  74. 65
  75. Acknowledgements
  76. About the Author
  77. Copyright

Some of the boys at Bishop Vesey’s Grammar had been at the same primary school as William. Thankfully, none had shown the slightest interest in what had happened to him while he was away. He’d tried to fit in these last couple of weeks. He’d even sat with a few of them in the cinema car park on Saturday night, eating fish and chips and drinking cider. The trouble was, not one of them could ever be anything like the friend Martin was. And if he could throw that away, what business did he have making new ones?

The discipline of his chorister days meant he was a good student without looking as if he was trying. He was friendly and polite, but made no attempt to get to know anyone, joined no clubs, and if he was invited out after school, he declined with a smile and a no thank you.

Robert sighed. ‘If your schoolwork doesn’t suffer, you’re welcome in here any time, my boy – though your poor mother’d be appalled.’

‘It’s none of her business.’

‘Come on now, she’s your mother.’

William sighed. ‘Why don’t you hate her?’

Robert turned to face William. ‘Because I know grief, William. Your father has been dead six years, and I still think of him every day. I need to do that with a clear conscience and a lightness of spirit. Your father loved your mother. If I hold on to bad feelings towards her, I couldn’t ever think of him without guilt. And I couldn’t bear that. So, when enough time has passed, I’ll hold out my hand to her and I’ll keep doing so. No matter if she refuses it, slaps it, or bites it off for that matter. She was the light of your father’s life. And anyway, you’ll be off to live with her soon.’

William looked back at Kenneth, and gently smoothed his hair again.

34

William doesn’t feel immediately at home at the Finches’; how could he? But he does feel welcome. Mr Finch, with furry little hoods of grey eyebrows, is formal yet warm. Mrs Finch is tiny, and wears slippers with a strap of light, feathery fluff, and high heels. When he first arrived, he was moved at how they took his hand in both of theirs. More than a handshake. Their daughter, Gloria, a trainee nurse, was eating out on his first night. After shepherd’s pie and peas, he excused himself to go and do his homework.

Now in his room, with its two single beds and striped wallpaper, he looks at his envelope, pristine, full of promise. Name the branches of the carotid arteries and trace the arteries and veins a particle of fluid from the big toe to the left ear would use. Roger and Simon opened their envelopes that afternoon but William slipped his into his briefcase for later.