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Back Until I Find You Save as PDF
Chapters (60)
  1. Title Page
  2. Copyright Notice
  3. Dedication
  4. Epigraph
  5. 1
  6. 2
  7. 3
  8. 4
  9. 5
  10. 6
  11. 7
  12. 8
  13. 9
  14. 10
  15. 11
  16. 12
  17. 13
  18. 14
  19. 15
  20. 16
  21. 17
  22. 18
  23. 19
  24. 20
  25. 21
  26. 22
  27. 23
  28. 24
  29. 25
  30. 26
  31. 27
  32. 28
  33. 29
  34. 30
  35. 31
  36. 32
  37. 33
  38. 34
  39. 35
  40. 36
  41. 37
  42. 38
  43. 39
  44. 40
  45. 41
  46. 42
  47. 43
  48. 44
  49. 45
  50. 46
  51. 47
  52. 48
  53. 49
  54. 50
  55. EPILOGUE
  56. ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
  57. DISCUSSION QUESTIONS
  58. Also by Rea Frey
  59. ABOUT THE AUTHOR
  60. Newsletter Sign-up

He’s silent, and I realize he’s probably nodding or shaking his head.

“Verbal, please.”

“Right, sorry. No, I never got married.” He pauses. “But you did.”

The words are a betrayal. I’m thinking what he’s thinking: how in the world could I have ever married someone else, even if that someone died? “I did.”

“I’m … so sorry. About what happened.” Something passes through his voice, but vanishes. “How long now?”

“A year. Hard to believe sometimes.”

“And you’re a mother?”

I smile. “I am. Jackson. He’s three months old.”

“So your husband—”

“Chris,” I supply.

“Chris. He never got to meet him?”

“No, he didn’t.” I clear my throat to keep from crying. “Life.” I shrug, such an insignificant movement to contain my sorrow. “And you heard about Mom?”

“I can’t believe it.” His voice lowers.

“She really loved you.”

“Because I loved her daughter.” The confession bullets into the room.

My heart literally skips a beat, and I realize I’m holding my breath. There are so many questions I want to ask. Is he happy? Has he thought about me over the years? Has he been in love since our breakup? Has he shot anyone? Has he been shot? I decide on the first question, but my phone interrupts. “Excuse me,” I say. “I need to get this.”

“Hey.” Jess’s voice is calm, but I immediately bristle.

“Is Jackson okay?”

“He’s fine. Rob left an important client file here and needs me to run it to him. Candace is off today, and I can take Jackson, but I don’t have an extra car seat.”

“I’ll be there as fast as I can.” I hang up, exhale, and return to the table. “Sorry, I have to go.”

Jake scratches his jaw. “Need a ride?”

I shake my head, because I’m afraid if I speak, my voice will betray me. “I’m just going to grab a Lyft.”

“You sure?”

“Positive.”

We walk outside. I call a Lyft. He steps closer.

“To be continued?”

I nod. “Definitely.”

When he leans in and whispers—“It’s been so good to see you, Bec”—I don’t pull away.

He’s gone before I can catch my breath.

11

CRYSTAL

They arrive at Bec’s right on time.

“Is that my superstar?” Bec opens the door in jean shorts and a crop top, a yellow kimono trailing her thighs.

“I cut off all my hair!” Savi exclaims. “Mom was always telling me to brush it, so now it’s short. Want to feel?” She bumps into the foyer with her cello case and accidentally rams into Bec.

“Savi.” Crystal snaps at her daughter—both for the admission and banging into her.

“She’s fine.” Bec laughs. “Let me feel this amazing hair.” Her fingers outstretch and playfully land on her face. She squeezes her nose. “Hmm, feels a little rough if you ask me.”