Yeah, she’s probably got a point. Who’s going to be bothered about what Cain says?

We heard the door open downstairs and Dibdobs shouted up, “Helllooooooo, it’s us. We’re back!”

I shouted, “Hello!”

And Ruby said, “’Ello, I’m here as well.”

Dibdobs shouted, “Hello, Ruby!”

And the twins shouted, “Hello, Booby!”

Ten minutes later Dibdobs came up with tea and toast. She put it on the bed and beamed at me. As she went out she said, “Well, you need to build your strength up, Lullah, if you’re going out canoodling with boys.”

Oh dear God, she knows.

Everyone knows.

I said to Ruby, “I’ll have to stay in bed forever. I can’t face people.”

Ruby got up and said, “Look, this is the North. People here dun’t wear vests in winter. One of the lads in The Iron Pies wore a short-sleeved T-shirt all last December and he’s the snowplow man. He’s got Northern grit. You’ve got to get Northern grit.”

I’ve spent the whole afternoon pulling myself together and making notes about Northern grit.

Right, this is my list:

1. Walk tall. Straighten my shoulders and look people in the eye—so what if I have snogged a boy. It’s not a hanging offense. (P.S. Although it may be a “sitting on” offense if I bump into Beverley Bottomly.)

2. If in doubt, look “hard” and strong. Or else try a distant smile.

3. Never complain about the cold.

4. Be nice around Charlie and hope he will forgive me.

5. Never acknowledge Cain again.

6. Wear more hats.

I’ve been practicing special “Northern grit” attitude for tomorrow. I’m going to tie my hair back in a ponytail and I’ve been practicing a nonchalant shrug. I think shrugging is the way forward. Anyway, I haven’t really done anything to be ashamed of.

Well, I have actually. But onwards and upwards.

Also, as an added precaution, I’m going to set off slightly earlier tomorrow so that I don’t bump into anyone in the village. I’ll be old news by the time I get to Dother Hall. Besides this week will be hectic because it’s the assessment performances on Friday lunchtime.

It’s all very well having Northern grit lists—but when I woke up in the middle of the night on my own I couldn’t help remembering Charlie’s face. The look he gave me as he left. And I can’t bear it that he really hates me because . . . well . . . I . . .

And then the tears started.

And once they had I couldn’t stop. I muffled my face in my pillow and really cried.

I must have cried myself to sleep.

On Monday, when I walked into the entrance hall, I was besieged by girls. Nearly everyone asked me if it was true that I was a Cain-snogger. And, what was worse, they seemed to think it was a good thing to be.

Even Lav.

Oh God.

She came swishing and blinking up and ruffled my hair.